Tensions rose between a local couple today after a woman texted her husband to ask him to pick up a mobile Target order for her on his way home from work, to which he replied "Ok." Reports indicated she was not at all happy with the tone of his "Ok" response.
Published: Sunday, April 2nd, 2023 @ 9:41 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Eight months after an Illinois woman reported her husband missing, she found him dead in their home.
Published: Thursday, March 23rd, 2023 @ 1:21 am
By: Daily Wire
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Despite having faithfully shepherded his congregation for twelve years, local Pastor Reagan Johnson has been removed from his post after a concerned congregant notified the elder board of his failing to have "Husband. Father. Pastor." in his bio on Twitter.
Published: Friday, February 10th, 2023 @ 11:14 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) reportedly had priests perform an “exorcism” on her home after her husband Paul was attacked with a hammer by an alleged intruder.
Published: Sunday, January 29th, 2023 @ 1:06 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Local wife Victoria Crab phoned her husband in the early evening Thursday to see if he could run by the store real quick on his way home from work so he could grab a couple thousand items.
Published: Thursday, January 26th, 2023 @ 9:06 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local man Jeremy Clams became bedridden Tuesday after a flu virus brutally assaulted his body with a sore throat, coughing, some body aches, and even a mild fever.
Published: Wednesday, January 25th, 2023 @ 9:56 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Witnesses reported that the Gerbison household was in an unpleasant state after the dumb oaf of a husband, Gill, assumed he could use the bathroom's hand towels to dry his hands.
Published: Wednesday, January 11th, 2023 @ 12:37 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Local woman Amber Rhodes suddenly snapped out of a deep, seven-month coma today, at the exact moment her husband booted up his PlayStation.
Published: Wednesday, January 11th, 2023 @ 12:29 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Is your husband cheating on you? We here at the Babylon Bee hate marital infidelity, so we consulted marriage experts to learn all the troubling signs to look for when a man isn't being faithful.
Published: Sunday, December 25th, 2022 @ 3:20 am
By: Babylon Bee
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After years of struggling to purchase his wife the right gift for Christmas, one local man started listening in October for ideas. His attentiveness gave him the idea of buying his wife a new, rechargeable vacuum
Published: Friday, December 23rd, 2022 @ 1:27 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local husband and useless idiot Virgil Marlo met with disaster Monday after placing throw pillows on the bed in the wrong order. The clueless husband had attempted to tidy up after knocking the pillows on the floor.
Published: Wednesday, December 21st, 2022 @ 11:47 am
By: Babylon Bee
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A family was brought to the brink of tragedy today as a local woman began making funeral arrangements for her husband when he failed to respond to her text message within 13 seconds.
Published: Friday, December 16th, 2022 @ 12:14 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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A minimum of 35 pieces of tape is needed to successfully wrap a gift, husband scientists said Monday. The surprise announcement was made by representatives of the National Institute of Standards and Technology (NIST) just in time for the holiday season.
Published: Friday, December 9th, 2022 @ 10:22 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Local husband Terry McGerry was seen beaming with confidence as he waited in line at the department store checkout, having picked out the wrong Christmas present for his wife weeks earlier than usual.
Published: Thursday, December 8th, 2022 @ 7:49 am
By: Babylon Bee
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A local man found cause for great concern this week when he discovered Amazon was moving forward with plans to build a distribution hub located in his front yard.
Published: Thursday, November 24th, 2022 @ 9:40 am
By: Babylon Bee
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After a bruising campaign and a protracted process of tabulating results, local man Mike Vaughan's wife has gained control of the house in a slim but decisive majority of 1 vote per wife and 1 vote per husband.
Published: Tuesday, November 22nd, 2022 @ 9:08 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Multiple sources have confirmed that local man Dan Zilph's Instagram account exists solely to wish his wife "happy birthday" every year.
Published: Thursday, November 17th, 2022 @ 3:04 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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According to sources close to local man Greg Bernard, the construction sales representative, husband, and father of five often makes cracks about how emotional and moody his wife is
Published: Friday, November 4th, 2022 @ 1:40 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Local Woman Francine Guacmeister faked another headache after her husband Allen suggested going up to the bedroom for a romantic night of watching the Lord of the Rings Motion Picture Trilogy: Extended Edition.
Published: Friday, October 28th, 2022 @ 3:05 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Local man Alex McIlvaine stumbled upon the brilliant idea today of adding a little sign to his cigar humidor that reads "Smokeable essential oils."
Published: Sunday, October 23rd, 2022 @ 3:47 am
By: Babylon Bee
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During a powerful Sunday sermon delivered by her pastor, a local woman has come under deep spiritual conviction that her husband really needs to repent of his sins.
Published: Wednesday, October 19th, 2022 @ 3:39 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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A local man has achieved the unthinkable and miraculously arrived home on time and in good health despite not having his wife with him in the car to provide constant safe driving instructions.
Published: Friday, October 14th, 2022 @ 8:13 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local husband Spencer Johnson has been given a life sentence of going to the pumpkin patch every year with his wife Megan.
Published: Wednesday, October 12th, 2022 @ 7:12 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Date night for Madilynn and Murphy McMickerson started off just like every other date night when Madilynn told the server she would just have a light salad followed by her husband's entire entree.
Published: Thursday, October 6th, 2022 @ 10:02 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local man Terrence Bilkerson successfully transitioned into a woman recently after taking his wife's multivitamin. The transition occurred instantly after he grabbed the wrong bottle of vitamins
Published: Thursday, October 6th, 2022 @ 2:08 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Supermodel Gisele Bündchen recently opened up about her husband Tom Brady coming out of retirement and returning to the NFL.
Published: Sunday, October 2nd, 2022 @ 3:21 pm
By: Daily Wire
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According to sources, local husband Brad Sanders has completely emptied the dishwasher without any prompting from his wife in hopes that she'll be cool with him watching 19 hours of football this weekend.
Published: Sunday, October 2nd, 2022 @ 2:28 am
By: Babylon Bee
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It's a tale that's all too common for marriages these days: things seem to be going great, with love and romance in the air, when suddenly, the husband begins to withdraw.
Published: Saturday, September 24th, 2022 @ 1:06 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local woman Sabrina McKenzie asked her husband to please go on an epic quest of mythologic proportions, since he was already up anyways to go to the bathroom.
Published: Wednesday, September 14th, 2022 @ 10:56 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local man Alex Gleitz began wondering today if he ought to perhaps do the dishes, having found himself eating Honey Nut Cheerios out of a flower vase.
Published: Wednesday, September 14th, 2022 @ 2:55 am
By: Babylon Bee
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According to sources, local woman Grace Barton committed to reveal her most recent Target receipt to her husband by noon today, but when she submitted the document, almost every word and line item on the receipt was redacted with a thick black bar.
Published: Wednesday, August 31st, 2022 @ 11:26 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Local wife and mother of three Hannah Baxter was tired of constantly reminding her husband, Brad, to put his socks in the dirty clothes hamper.
Published: Wednesday, August 31st, 2022 @ 9:41 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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We at The Babylon Bee want to help de-code common marital communications between the spouses, whether it's helping husbands know whether their wives are mad at them or helping wives to understand the mixed signals, coded messages, and confounding double-speak from the complicated creatures
Published: Sunday, August 21st, 2022 @ 12:26 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Paul Pelosi was slurring his words and smelled strongly of booze after wrecking his Porsche in May, according to a police complaint filed ahead of the House Speaker’s husband’s arraignment Wednesday.
Published: Sunday, August 14th, 2022 @ 10:34 pm
By: Daily Wire
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