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Dread it. Run from it. 2024 has arrived all the same. But fear not as the team at The Babylon Bee has been hard at work for you coming up with the most probable, and completely accurate 2024 predictions to help you make it through the New Year.
Dread it. Run from it. 2024 has arrived all the same. But fear not as the team at The Babylon Bee has been hard at work for you coming up with the most probable, and completely accurate 2024 predictions to help you make it through the New Year.
 
President Joe Biden took a few questions during a brief ice cream break with NBC late-night host and comedian Seth Meyers, telling reporters he hoped the United States could help facilitate a ceasefire in Gaza by Monday.
President Joe Biden took a few questions during a brief ice cream break with NBC late-night host and comedian Seth Meyers, telling reporters he hoped the United States could help facilitate a ceasefire in Gaza by Monday.
 
Daily Wire Editor Emeritus Ben Shapiro said that leftist governments in Latin America will eventually crash into the “rocks of reality” as their socialist policies wreck their countries, in the latest episode of his YouTube show “Facts.”
Daily Wire Editor Emeritus Ben Shapiro said that leftist governments in Latin America will eventually crash into the “rocks of reality” as their socialist policies wreck their countries, in the latest episode of his YouTube show “Facts.”
 
The Hamas plan, shared by other radical Islamic groups, to drive the Jews out of Israel is having an unintended effect, as rising anti-Semitism around the globe after the Hamas massacre of Israelis on October 7 is reportedly catalyzing Jews to consider moving to Israel.
The Hamas plan, shared by other radical Islamic groups, to drive the Jews out of Israel is having an unintended effect, as rising anti-Semitism around the globe after the Hamas massacre of Israelis on October 7 is reportedly catalyzing Jews to consider moving to Israel.
 
Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) said on Sunday he believes Rep. Jim Jordan (R-OH) will rally enough support to become the next Speaker of the House.
Rep. Kevin McCarthy (R-CA) said on Sunday he believes Rep. Jim Jordan (R-OH) will rally enough support to become the next Speaker of the House.
 
Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) says that he does not think that the cocaine that was found in the White House this week belongs to Hunter Biden.
Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) says that he does not think that the cocaine that was found in the White House this week belongs to Hunter Biden.
 
Former President Donald Trump is nothing if not prescient on some of the biggest cultural and business issues of the day.
Former President Donald Trump is nothing if not prescient on some of the biggest cultural and business issues of the day.
 
The number of January 6 prosecutions could double if a newly revealed prediction by the Justice Department comes true.
The number of January 6 prosecutions could double if a newly revealed prediction by the Justice Department comes true.
 
Various polls show that economists generally expect a recession this year, although there is no consensus among leading analysts.
Various polls show that economists generally expect a recession this year, although there is no consensus among leading analysts.
 
It's that time of year again - when the mystic oracles at The Babylon Bee tell you what will happen in the next year with 100% accuracy! Will 2023 be better than this year? You decide!
It's that time of year again - when the mystic oracles at The Babylon Bee tell you what will happen in the next year with 100% accuracy! Will 2023 be better than this year? You decide!
 
One analyst predicted on Monday that Elon Musk could eventually move Twitter to Austin, Texas, from San Francisco, California, alongside his other enterprises.
One analyst predicted on Monday that Elon Musk could eventually move Twitter to Austin, Texas, from San Francisco, California, alongside his other enterprises.
 
A new study indicates that scientists have discovered a method for predicting cervical cancer that could be extrapolated for use in predicting breast, womb, and ovarian cancer.
A new study indicates that scientists have discovered a method for predicting cervical cancer that could be extrapolated for use in predicting breast, womb, and ovarian cancer.
 
"Goodbye My Sweetheart, Hello Vietnam" This refrain from Dave Dudley's country ditty, an integral melody in the soundtrack of the classic "Full Metal Jacket" regarding a more patriotic approach to the Vietnam predicament.
"Goodbye My Sweetheart, Hello Vietnam" This refrain from Dave Dudley's country ditty, an integral melody in the soundtrack of the classic "Full Metal Jacket" regarding a more patriotic approach to the Vietnam predicament.
 
Frank Main and Fran Spielman write in the Chicago Sun-Times about one consequence of the recent nationwide attack on police.
Frank Main and Fran Spielman write in the Chicago Sun-Times about one consequence of the recent nationwide attack on police.
 
Former U.S. House Speaker Newt Gingrich writes at FoxNews.com that the Republican Party is not as likely to fracture as its opponents hope.
Former U.S. House Speaker Newt Gingrich writes at FoxNews.com that the Republican Party is not as likely to fracture as its opponents hope.
 
After getting many political predictions wrong in 2016, including but not limited to the results of the presidential election, I threw my long-cherished crystal ball out and started building a new one.
After getting many political predictions wrong in 2016, including but not limited to the results of the presidential election, I threw my long-cherished crystal ball out and started building a new one.
 
Cabot Phillips writes at the Daily Wire about a notable failure in 2020 election predictions.
Cabot Phillips writes at the Daily Wire about a notable failure in 2020 election predictions.
 
Amid widespread predictions of a big Joe Biden win, Jon Levine ponders in the New York Post what will happen if Democrats lose the presidential race.
Amid widespread predictions of a big Joe Biden win, Jon Levine ponders in the New York Post what will happen if Democrats lose the presidential race.
 
“I would still put my money on November, December”
 
Naomi Lim of the Washington Examiner highlights Democratic leaders’ reactions to recent electoral developments.
Naomi Lim of the Washington Examiner highlights Democratic leaders’ reactions to recent electoral developments.
 
Roger Simon writes for The Epoch Times about a likely backlash from today’s crazed political culture.
Roger Simon writes for The Epoch Times about a likely backlash from today’s crazed political culture.
 
From heterosexual transmission of AIDS to the threats of Avian Flu H5N1 and the Zika virus, the NIAID director has warned of nightmare scenarios for decades.
From heterosexual transmission of AIDS to the threats of Avian Flu H5N1 and the Zika virus, the NIAID director has warned of nightmare scenarios for decades.
 
Thomas Lifson of the American Thinker explores one potential consequence of the COVID-19 pandemic. It’s bad news for those touting catastrophic computer models.
Thomas Lifson of the American Thinker explores one potential consequence of the COVID-19 pandemic. It’s bad news for those touting catastrophic computer models.
 
James Antle explains in the Washington Examiner how the coronavirus could affect the presidential election four years from now.
James Antle explains in the Washington Examiner how the coronavirus could affect the presidential election four years from now.
 
New reports from the Chinese government indicate that the number of people who have been infected by the coronavirus jumped from 2,700 yesterday to over 4,500 today as the number of people who have died from the outbreak is now well over 100.
New reports from the Chinese government indicate that the number of people who have been infected by the coronavirus jumped from 2,700 yesterday to over 4,500 today as the number of people who have died from the outbreak is now well over 100.
 
Looking into the crystal ball for the year ahead, here are some dramatic possibilities — and they include some very good news for Donald Trump
Looking into the crystal ball for the year ahead, here are some dramatic possibilities — and they include some very good news for Donald Trump
 
In eight of the nine last presidential elections, American University professor Allan J. Lichtman has correctly predicted who would win. He now says that, according to his model, the 2020 election is “too close to call.”
In eight of the nine last presidential elections, American University professor Allan J. Lichtman has correctly predicted who would win. He now says that, according to his model, the 2020 election is “too close to call.”
 
The Keys are statements that favor victory (in the popular vote count) for the incumbent party. When five or fewer statements are false, the incumbent party is predicted to win the popular vote; when six or more are false, the challenging party is predicted to win the popular vote.
The Keys are statements that favor victory (in the popular vote count) for the incumbent party. When five or fewer statements are false, the incumbent party is predicted to win the popular vote; when six or more are false, the challenging party is predicted to win the popular vote.
 
Many years ago, I copied a chart of the 72 names in Hebrew without definitions from a long forgotten book title.
Many years ago, I copied a chart of the 72 names in Hebrew without definitions from a long forgotten book title.
 
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