Members of a local church gathering took notice of a substantial increase in the volume of the congregational singing when the worship leader snuck in an old classic hymn during last Sunday morning's service.
Published: Tuesday, September 19th, 2023 @ 11:33 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Members of Knoxville Community Church were shocked as they suddenly realized that the number of people in their worship band officially exceeded the number in the actual congregation.
Published: Monday, September 18th, 2023 @ 3:49 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Worship leader Paul "Seven-String" Johnson recently introduced a worship song that came out in 2021 as a "classic hymn," according to sources at Grace Explosion Church.
Published: Sunday, September 17th, 2023 @ 10:02 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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In an ideal world, every church would be perfect and you'd stay there your whole life. Unfortunately, there are times when you feel led to find a new church to attend. But how do you know which church should be your new place of worship?
Published: Thursday, September 14th, 2023 @ 6:00 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Local atheist Jerry Carson spent another Sunday worshipping himself, say sources. The self-focused man reportedly woke up early to fix himself some breakfast before devoting himself to couch meditations for the remainder of the morning.
Published: Tuesday, July 25th, 2023 @ 6:11 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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In a final attempt to rein in their worship leader, Knoxville's Church on the Rock has instituted a pitch clock for all of the miniature sermons he tries to work in between songs.
Published: Wednesday, May 10th, 2023 @ 6:59 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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The Catholic church is currently being infiltrated by a number of undercover FBI agents who are partaking in the sacraments, earning indulgences, and even becoming priests.
Published: Monday, February 13th, 2023 @ 6:13 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local man Brad Johnson has joined Faith Covenant's worship band, giving it the token forty-something balding guy it was sorely missing.
Published: Friday, February 10th, 2023 @ 10:09 am
By: Babylon Bee
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God Regrets Writing 'Sing To The Lord A New Song' After Hearing The New Songs Christians Are SingingWorship leaders worldwide were left stunned today after word began to spread that the Lord now regrets including the command "Sing unto the Lord a new song" in His Word after hearing the new songs Christians are currently singing.
Published: Wednesday, February 1st, 2023 @ 11:38 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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If you've been to church lately, you have probably noticed that the so-called "order of worship" really serves as more of a vague set of suggestions. Here, we present to you a more realistic order of worship, in all its glory:
Published: Friday, January 27th, 2023 @ 9:31 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The Second Baptist community was in shock last Sunday after setting a record for the shortest Black church service in history. The service, which lasted just four hours and fifty-two minutes, was led by the church's new pastor, Rev. Ralph Washington Jenkins.
Published: Wednesday, January 25th, 2023 @ 6:58 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The local worship band for Redeemer Church has continued its decade-long shadow ban on bass player Kevin Young.
Published: Tuesday, December 13th, 2022 @ 1:07 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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In preparation for another grueling worship service, local pentecostal Sam Twibbins is loading up on a pre-workout concoction of whey protein, creatine, and beta-alanine for maximum gains and recovery.
Published: Friday, October 21st, 2022 @ 9:23 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Trust God
Published: Saturday, October 8th, 2022 @ 2:23 pm
By: Countrygirl1411
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After gathering at the steps of the Supreme Court and chanting all through the night in support of abortion, a crowd of worshippers are still having a hard time getting their pagan god Moloch to hear them.
Published: Tuesday, May 10th, 2022 @ 12:01 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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New COVID-19 Toolkit Available for Faith Leaders; Guidance for Places of Worship Updated for Phase 3The North Carolina Department of Health and Human Services updated its COVID-19 guidance for places of worship and shared a toolkit to support faith leaders in slowing the spread of the virus.
Published: Thursday, October 8th, 2020 @ 3:30 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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More than 12,000 people gathered at the California State Capitol in Sacramento on Sunday for a Christian music concert and worship service, according to an estimate by one of its organizers.
Published: Monday, September 14th, 2020 @ 3:45 pm
By: Daily Wire
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The COVID-19 outbreak can’t be an excuse to outlaw most indoor worship services in North Carolina, a federal judge ruled Saturday, May 16.
Published: Tuesday, May 19th, 2020 @ 7:59 am
By: Carolina Journal
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A growing number of N.C. sheriffs won’t enforce Gov. Roy Cooper’s restrictions against indoor worship services as outlined in his latest executive order.
Published: Monday, May 18th, 2020 @ 11:41 am
By: Carolina Journal
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On Thursday, May 14, a class-action lawsuit was filed against Governor Roy Cooper’s executive order establishing social distancing guidelines aimed to prevent the spread of coronavirus.
Published: Sunday, May 17th, 2020 @ 12:31 pm
By: John Locke Foundation
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On Sunday, we watched our church worship service on YouTube, after Methodist Bishops in North Carolina told churches not to hold services for at least two weeks.
Published: Friday, March 20th, 2020 @ 5:10 pm
By: Tom Campbell
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If you have spent any time on Beaufort County NOW, you possibly have noticed that I, Stan Deatherage your humble reporter, have written extensively about Advocacy Journalism, coined by me as the Democrat Media.
Published: Wednesday, January 17th, 2018 @ 8:02 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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Mrs. Ivia Lee Credle Ward, 80, of 204 Cherry Lane, Chocowinity, died Monday, June 20, 2011. A funeral will be conducted at 1 p.m. Saturday at Cornerstone Family Worship Center Church of God with Bishop James S. McIntyre Sr. officiating.
Published: Friday, June 24th, 2011 @ 1:26 pm
By: Announcements
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