Sudden Unexplained Sickness Expected To Decimate America's Workforce On May 12, 2023 | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    U.S.     Is this the next pandemic? Health experts claim that a sudden, unexpected illness is expected to cause many American employees to stay home, some for a week or more, on May 12, 2023.

    "All indicators suggest that millions of Americans will be calling into work sick with a mysterious illness that exact day," said Dr. Fred Hollister. "It's baffling. We haven't seen anything like this since the unexplained plague of November 9, 2004, or the sudden wave of 'I think I'm coming down with something, boss' that smashed businesses' productivity on January 31, 2008."

    According to experts, these sudden spikes in workers calling in sick are totally unaccounted for, with researchers desperately trying to figure out the reason behind the unexplained wave of people calling into work all on the same, seemingly arbitrary date.

    "It's like something out of legend," said Hollister. "But we're on a mission - a quest, if you will - to look across history and through time and figure out what exactly the link between May 12 and everyone calling into work is."

    At publishing time, Dr. Hollister had confirmed that he too was feeling a "little tickle in the throat" and would probably be absent from work on May 12.

poll#162

In what may be the most divisive period in modern American History, even more divisive than the turbulent sixties due to today's lack of patriotism, consider what are the major catalysts causing so much of this calamity of conflict, and vote: What most instigates the division of America, on this day September 20, 2022?

  Racism within our society

  Sex realignment to the detriment of our society.

  Biden /Harris Wide Open Southern Border Policy for the Demographic Upheaval of OUR Constitutional Republic

  Rampant Crime in Democratic controlled cities, and the possible contagion elsewhere

  Covid Pandemic, and its mishandling at the political, and bureaucratic levels.

  The unresolved questions /allegation regarding the flawed 2020 General Election

  January 6th Riot or "Armed Insurrection", depending upon patriotic perspective

  Joe Biden as Divisive Leader; Ineffective and Corrupt Executive

  Failed Education Industry, from an overall perspective, regarding all levels of education.

  Propagandistic Media in complete conflict with the First Amendment's guarantee of Freedom of Speech, and the awesome responsibility of a Free Press..

  "Orangeman Bad!"

  Bureaucracy rushing to a behemoth size, its unjustified expense, and far too often overreach.

  The Weaponized Deep State for political purposes

  A secular ambivalence to all that is real.

  Record number of overdose deaths from opioids and now Fentanyl

  Biden Administration's disastrous Foreign Policy

  Bidenflation /supply chain failure inevitably evolving into stagflation and recession.

  "Ultra MAGA Extremists" freely speaking louder AND LOUDER!

928 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#154

Inarguably, the policies of the Democrats in congress and Joe Biden as the Executive is plunging the United States into a recession, if we are not already there; a recession that was completely avoidable. Will abrupt changes in policies occur in time?

  Yes, the Democrats have a bold plan, yet to be revealed, to save us.

  No, there will have to be a complete undoing of the damage done by these Democrats.

  I can't do simple math, so how am I to understand the concept of basic economics.

1,216 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?