Breaking: Every Dad Who Received '#1 Dad' Mug To Face Off In Giant Deathmatch | Eastern North Carolina Now

With over 30 million "#1 Dad" mugs given out this Father's Day, all dads who received this mug have been ordered to face off in a giant deathmatch to determine who the true "#1 Dad" is.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WORLD     With over 30 million "#1 Dad" mugs given out this Father's Day, all dads who received this mug have been ordered to face off in a giant deathmatch to determine who the true "#1 Dad" is.

    "There can be only one," said Chad Smith, a local dad. "It's time for us dads to face each other on the field of glorious battle for ultimate dad supremacy. For too long, we have allowed millions of fakers to hold up their '#1 Dad' gear unopposed, regardless of their actual dad ability and ranking. Our families should have thought twice before unthinkingly bestowing this dubious honor on all of us. It's time we knew the truth."

    Initial reports indicate the world's dads will face each other at sunrise in the Giants Stadium and engage in furious combat until only one dad is left standing.

    Smith says he's confident he will be victorious when the battle is over. "While all you dads were playing video games and drinking beer, I studied the blade," he said.

    President Biden will reportedly be exempt from the showdown as Hunter skipped buying a "#1 Dad" mug in favor of another $3 million payment from China this year.
Go Back


Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published)
Enter Your Comment ( no code or urls allowed, text only please )




Man On 8th Booster Still Chasing That High He Got With The First Shot Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Beasley Caught Repeating Corporate PAC Money Lie


HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

weather dependant wind and solar is expensive and unreliable
The U.S. and Israel have repeatedly vowed that they will not allow Iran to obtain a nuclear weapon.
Harris confirms she ran a fake campaign
Free Democrats finally pull the plug on wildly unpopular government

HbAD1

Crediblity is at an all time low as average American no longer trusts them
Governor Abbot reveals that election give them the votes to pass school choice
survived two recall attampts in four years, but spectacularly loses reelection bid
illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic
Dems tried it in serveral locations but GOP prevailing and kept poll watchers on duty

HbAD2

Representative Keith Kidwell ( R-Beaufort ) offered the following comment on threats made against himself and others at the Beaufort County Board of Elections early voting site.
"When you say you love America, that's a verb, that also means you love Americans," he said.
even Bill Clinton has admitted at Kamala Harris event that economy was better under Trump
Democrat firm out of Arizona is responsible, probably did same thing thee

HbAD3

 
Back to Top