Al Gore Dresses Up Like Swedish Teen Girl So People Will Listen To Him Again | Eastern NC Now

Former Vice President and climate activist Al Gore has had trouble in recent years getting people to listen to his dire warnings about the coming climate apocalypse.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    Former Vice President and climate activist Al Gore has had trouble in recent years getting people to listen to his dire warnings about the coming climate apocalypse. In a last-ditch effort to make people notice him again, he is now touring the country dressed as a teenage girl from Sweden.

    Now named Alda Goreberg, the fresh-faced climate spokesperson is making waves across the country.

    "The end is near! The end is near! We have until nine years ago to stop the polar ice caps from melting!" cried Alda Goreberg, now sporting braided hair. "Stop having kids! Start eating bugs! Stop having electricity! HOW DARE YOU!"

    Thanks to his new look, Goreberg has finally amassed a following of devoted fans excited to hear what a Swedish teen has to say about what the climate will be in 120 years.

    "You know, this girl really makes sense," said one attendee at one of Goreberg's many speaking events. "I wasn't really worried about the climate, but when she screamed 'HOW DARE YOU!' at me, I finally saw the light. Plus, she's Swedish. Those Swedes know what they're talking about."

    At publishing time, another climate activist named Greta Thunberg announced she is now a trans man in hopes of getting people to start listening to her again.
Go Back

HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

If you are covering Roy Cooper in Greensboro today, please consider the following statement from the Republican National Committee:
Obama and Biden judges abuse power for political reasons to try to stop Haitian deportations
teachers union rally held on major socialist / communist May Day holiday
Democrats foment climate of violence against Trump and GOP

HbAD1

Cheryl Hines. Dennis Quaid. Nicki Minaj. All became associated with the Trump administration. What happened next?
A federal grand jury in North Carolina has indicted former FBI Director James Comey on two charges related to making threats against President Donald Trump.
Their goal was simple: to put a Planned Parenthood in every mailbox in America.
Treasury officials allege these groups pose as humanitarian entities while covertly siphoning donations to Hamas.
President Donald Trump has publicly floated regime change and other aggressive actions toward Cuba.
With a new roadside plaque unveiled in Ellerbe on April 23, legendary wrestler and local resident André René Roussimoff is finally getting the formal recognition fans believe he deserves.

HbAD2

Following a string of attacks, critics are calling for denaturalizations. It's not that simple.
Understanding how parties work is important for making informed decisions regarding elected officials.
The solution is not to legalize the problem; it is to enforce the law consistently and deter future illegal immigration.
The teachers union is pushing to cancel school on May 1 as Chicago public schools continue to report dismal student proficiency rates.
Mission accomplished on sending inspiration from the dark side of the moon.

HbAD3

 
 
Back to Top