Father Living His Best Life During Those 3 Hours On Saturday Morning When He's The Only One Up | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    FALLS CHURCH, VA     Local father Justin Walker works 60 hours a week, helps with the kids and housework, plays in a church softball league, volunteers for Sunday service, and does yard work on the weekends. He loves his kids and his wife more than anything in the world - but he also reports that he really "lives his best life" during those three hours on Saturday morning when he's the only one awake.

    "Look, I love my family - but oh, the sweet bliss of the hours between 6:30 and 9:30 a.m. on Saturday morning - there's nothing like it in the world," Walker told reporters as he sipped his morning coffee and looked out over the quiet solitude of his neighborhood from his front porch.

    Every Saturday morning, Walker's able to do things he can't do at any other time of the week. He reportedly plays one of the 767 Steam games he owns for "at least 10 minutes", answers emails that have been languishing forgotten in his inbox for the past seven days, drinks five coffees, gets in a workout, tinkers with a neglected DIY project in the garage, organizes his hobby shelf, makes breakfast, watches a few YouTube videos, and even reads his Bible.

    "This truly is my best life," he said as he worked up his fifth cup of coffee using the family's AeroPress coffee maker.

    "Ah, dang it. The kid's up," Walker said as he heard the pitter-patter of feet upstairs. "I love him!" he was quick to add. "But, you know. It's back to the frontlines for me now. Until next week, Saturday morning. Farewell!"