Planned Parenthood Hires Long-Range Snipers To Perform Abortions In Red States | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    U.S.     Three months have passed since the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, and Planned Parenthood has since struggled to reach its goals of lovingly killing unborn babies and harvesting their parts for money due to conservative states outlawing the practice. As a result, the organization has begun to hire long-range snipers to perform abortions in red states.

    "Adversity breeds creativity," said Planned Parenthood CEO Lucifer S. Bloodleech while handing out photos of pregnant women to snipers heading to states like Texas and Mississippi. "We brainstormed poisoning water supplies, nuking Utah, and more. But in the end, we felt hiring long-range snipers to be the most effective use of taxpayer dollars."

    When asked whether they considered the fact that women who choose to give birth express joy at welcoming a baby into the world regardless of the difficulty, uncertainty, and inconvenience, Bloodleech gave a ponderous pause but was interrupted by a demonic underling reporting that one sniper was perched in a tree overlooking a minority neighborhood.

    "Jackpot!" said Bloodleech, "Open fire."

    At publishing time, Planned Parenthood had lobbied California to legalize high-capacity magazines so they could murder more babies at once.

poll#154

Inarguably, the policies of the Democrats in congress and Joe Biden as the Executive is plunging the United States into a recession, if we are not already there; a recession that was completely avoidable. Will abrupt changes in policies occur in time?

  Yes, the Democrats have a bold plan, yet to be revealed, to save us.

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poll#152

With Roe v Wade (originated in 1973) overturned by the US Supreme Court, thereby allowing decisions on abortion legislation completely returned to the states: Where do you find your position on such a "Life and Death" issue for the American People?

  Yes, I approve of the US Supreme Court's decision to reinstate this "medical" issue back to the states' legislative responsibility to regulate.

  No, I believe that every woman should have complete access to abortion on demand.

  This issue is far beyond my intellectual capacity to understand.

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