Tragedies That Could Have Been Prevented With Better Gun Control | Eastern NC Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    Guns. They've caused countless tragedies. The list of tragedies that could have been prevented by guns is literally infinite, especially when you consider the multiverse.

    Here is a small sampling of tragedies that could have been prevented with common sense gun control:

1. World War I: Without guns, they would have just resorted to slap fights. In the case of the French, tickle fights.
2. World War II: Imagine what would have happened if Hitler had never been able to access an AR-15.
3. That time Chick-Fil-A ran out of sauce: And even during the crisis, Congress did NOTHING.
4. 9/11: If only those planes had been stored locked and unloaded.
5. The destruction of Hometree on Pandora by the forces of Colonel Miles Quatrich: You know, from Avatar? No? You already forgot that movie? Well, it was sad.
6. The conquest of Asia by Genghis Khan: Red flag laws could have stopped this.
7. That time you failed a test: We're sure gun laws factor in somehow.
8. The eruption of Mount St. Helens: Mother Nature was mad about the guns. When will we listen?!
9. Climate change: Climate change is caused by guns. Guns are caused by climate change. It's a vicious circle.
10. Aerith's tragic death in Final Fantasy VII: To this day, we're still scarred.
11. The Beverly hillbillies moving to Beverly Hills: Jed Clampett should have never had access to that there rifle.
12. Noah's flood: Let's hope it doesn't take another flood for us to finally get rid of all these guns!