Aliens Visit Leader Of Free World | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    MAR-A-LAGO, FL     In one of the most momentous events in the history of mankind, a species of noble and intelligent aliens has made landfall in Florida to make first contact with the Leader of the Free World, President Donald J. Trump.

    The alien delegates were reportedly impressed by the firmness and duration of President Trump's handshake.

    "On behalf of the greatest America ever, and the whole world I guess, welcome to the greatest Earth in the Scutum Centaurus arm of the Galaxy," said President Trump, humbled to be chosen as the honored representative of humanity. "And let me just tell you while you're here, Europe is really not worth visiting; they don't shower much and I'm not sure why. Sad, really."

    The initial welcome and diplomatic photo shoot was followed by a gift exchange where the generous aliens presented Trump with a statue of his bust which had been carved from the wishbone of a gentle space whale matriarch by their most respected sculptor, Xzit'urz Qixmy'r.

    The Commander-in-Chief then bestowed to his new extraterrestrial friends an invaluable signed MAGA hat and a printout of his SuperTrump NFT.

    Diplomatic meetings ended with President Trump promising to stop old Sleepy Joe Biden from shooting down all of their gracious peace offering balloons.

    President of Earth Stacey Abrams could not be reached for comment.
Go Back

HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

bought Manhattan prosecutor's office for $1 million
Pope Francis criticized radical gender ideology in a recent interview, referring to it as “one of the most dangerous ideological colonizations” in the current public discourse.
Following the unexpected collapse of Silicon Valley Bank, company officials have reached out to customers who lost their life savings with promises of a free pen.
House Intelligence Committee Chairman Mike Turner (R-OH) said that communist China is using TikTok to make its way into U.S. data systems as calls grow for the federal government to ban the app.
Gov. Cooper Proposes Historic Investments in Education, Economic Development, and Workforce Without Raising Taxes
RALEIGH: Tex-Tech Industries, a leading manufacturer of specialty textiles, will create 49 new jobs in Forsyth County, Governor Roy Cooper announced today. The company will invest more than $24.8 million to build a new manufacturing center in Winston-Salem.
Rep. Nancy Mace (R-SC) brought up left-wing riots during an interview over the weekend when asked about the recent media coverage surrounding the January 6 riot following the release of thousands of hours of video footage from the incident.
General Assembly leaders agreed to a bottom-line budget number last week, kicking off the biennium budget season. Senate Leader Phil Berger (R-Rockingham) and House Speaker Tim Moore (R-Cleveland) announced that General Fund spending would increase by 6.5% in the first year
House Intelligence Committee Chairman Mike Turner (R-OH) slammed Dr. Anthony Fauci, former director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, over the weekend for making statements about the origins of COVID that are not supported by the findings of the U.S. intelligence

HbAD1

In recent months, Republican Governors like Gregg Abbott have continued their cruel campaign against parents who pursue constitutionally-protected avenues for cleaning their children.
Senator John Kennedy (R-LA) said during an interview on Sunday that when he approached President Joe Biden about using the U.S. military to take out Mexican drug cartels, the president rebuffed him and said that it was a “bad idea.”
In a press conference Thursday, Senate Leader Phil Berger and House Speaker Tim Moore announced that an agreement has been reached between the chambers to expand the federal Medicaid entitlement program in North Carolina.
House Foreign Affairs Committee Chairman Michael McCaul (R-TX) said on Sunday that testimony from a U.S. Marine Corps Sergeant about President Joe Biden’s disastrous pullout from Afghanistan was “devastating and damaging to the administration.”
Today, Republican National Committee (RNC) Chairwoman Ronna McDaniel released the following statement on February's Producer Price Index:
Former Acting Attorney General Matt Whitaker explained to Sen. Marsha Blackburn (R-TN) this week how President Joe Biden’s Department of Justice is a “two-tiered system of justice” in which conservatives often get the short end of the stick.
Bob and Louise Herman reportedly caused ruinous, irredeemable destruction on their teenager's life forever for the fifth time today.
The U.S. Navy announced this week that it would be renaming a ship named for oceanographic pioneer Matthew Fontaine Maury because of Maury’s ties to the Confederacy during the later years of his life.
Florida Republican Governor Ron DeSantis’ first memoir, which was launched ahead of an expected announcement that he will run for president in 2024, sold more copies in its first week than books from Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and Hillary Clinton.

HbAD2

North Carolina’s state motto offers a great guide to policymakers
White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre faced backlash late this week after falsely claiming during a White House press briefing that Daily Wire host Michael Knowles called for the “eradication of transgender people” during a speech at CPAC.
A federal judge canceled a March 7 hearing in a lawsuit pitting the University of North Carolina against an expelled student. The student claims UNC mishandled sex assault allegations against him.
Energy Department Secretary Jennifer Granholm gushed about China’s approach to green energy in a Friday interview, saying she hoped that the U.S. could learn from China’s approach.
The showdown over the future of the federal budget is taking shape as President Joe Biden releases his fiscal year 2024 spending proposal and House Republicans prepare to leverage their new majority to block the plan.
On Sunday, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences awarded the Oscar for best actor in a leading role to a young Ukrainian man for his hard work on and off the screen.
Stanford University’s law school is deemed the second-best in the nation in the latest U.S. News and World Report, which means its current enrollees likely include future senators, judges, and possibly even Supreme Court justices who will help shape American law over the next half-century.
On Wednesday, North Carolina legislators took a step toward repealing the literacy test requirement from the N.C. Constitution. Legislators heard House Bill 44 in the Judiciary 2 committee Wednesday. The bill would place a constitutional amendment on the 2024 general election ballot.
An African delegation bucked the UN by screening The Daily Wire’s “What Is A Woman?” in honor of a women’s conference Friday, even after they were told the hit documentary did not align with the hosting commission’s values.

HbAD3

 
Back to Top