Romantic Scene In Little Mermaid Reboot Will Have Ariel Signing 35-Page Consent Form Before Kissing Eric

Latest Polls (view all)

Under the cover of Covid, and now in the shadow of the infamous Election Irregularities of that fated 2020 presidential election, with current emerging alleged election fraud in Nevada and Pennsylvania inconveniently slipping into the public discourse, there is proved a colluded ongoing Election Interference in the nomination of the Republican candidate, the likes of which has never occurred in our Constitutional Republic's history, albeit, the question remains: Do you support the plain-sight Election Interference of the Democratic Socialist party, employing its minions in their Propagandistic Media, and their Two Tiered Justice System?

98.85% No, I do not support Election Interference; I am a patriot unto our Constitution.

1.15% Yes, I do support Election Interference; the alternative, Donald Trump, to this mentally diminished president is far worse.

0% "What, me worry" if elections are rigged?

Click Here to Vote
87 Vote(s)

View all Polls

Romantic Scene In Little Mermaid Reboot Will Have Ariel Signing 35-Page Consent Form Before Kissing Eric

Published: Thursday, May 4th, 2023 @ 7:12 am
By: Babylon Bee ( More Entries )

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    LOS ANGELES, CA     Disney's live-action remake of The Little Mermaid promises to revitalize the classic with a more diverse cast and crew, as well as the addition of an extended romantic scene that ends with Ariel reviewing and signing a 35-page consent form before Eric is able to "Kiss The Girl."

    "The music swells as the light flirtation escalates into steamy romantic entanglement, with a drawn-out crescendo as Ariel reads and signs the 35-page consent form that Eric presents to her when she leans in for a kiss!" Composer Alan Menken says the studio expects the adjustment to be a welcome change to modern viewers, serving as an overdue acknowledgment of the original song's "pushy overtones."

    "After making his poor suggestions for Eric to 'steal a kiss,' Sebastian the Crab finds himself facing a long lecture from Eric about Informed Consent," said Menken. "Requesting confirmation and written documentation of approval for any and all romantic contact before soliciting a kiss has become necessary for today's audiences."

    At publishing time, Disney announced that the live-action remake of Sleeping Beauty will feature Prince Phillip filibustering for 78 hours before abandoning Princess Aurora to her fate after she fails to wake up and sign his legally binding consent form.

Go Back