Republicans Vote To Put Trump, DeSantis In Their Get-Along Shirt | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    U.S.     As tensions between warring camps have reached a fevered pitch, Republicans have taken a significant step in an attempt to make peace, opting to put both former President Donald Trump and Florida Governor Ron DeSantis in a "Get-Along" t-shirt.

    "We tried everything else," said GOP voter Ryan Felix. "We put them each in 'time out,' we told them to share their toys, and we even limited their screen time, but nothing worked. With them fighting like cats and dogs, the 'Get-Along' shirt became our best option."

    Neither party seemed eager to comply with the results of the vote. "How can you expect me to share a t-shirt with this man?" Governor DeSantis asked. "He's mean to me, he calls me names, he even stole my pudding cup. This is unacceptable." Trump was likewise unhappy with the decision. "'Rob' DeSantis rode my coattails to win in Florida, and now he wants to get more attention by sharing a t-shirt with me? Nice try, Meatball! You don't deserve to wear a shirt with me. SAD!"

    With many pressing issues facing the nation, smoothing things over between the two campaigns is a priority. "If the 'Get-Along' shirt doesn't work, I don't know what we'll have to do," Felix continued. "At some point, it might just have to be a cage match on pay-per-view."

    At publishing time, the two presidential candidates were still arguing in the shirt, with DeSantis strongly opposing Trump's request to watch Disney+.

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In the most recent Midterms Election, the "Republican Red Wave" turned out to be a "Republican Red Ripple," which, as in all elections, confounded the political prognosticators of what to expect down the governing /political road: What, and who, do you think is best for this meandering Representative Republic in the near future?

  Because they know how to best allocate the public's money back to the right part of the public, the Democrats will NOW always prevail and get my vote.

  With patriotic pragmatism the cornerstone of the best of the Republican Party, they will ultimately save this Constitutional Republic from self-destruction.

  Since the Executive Branch is so important to turn this Representative Republic around, I am still on Team Trump in 2024.

  Since the nation may need a different path to Conservative patriotism in the Executive, I am joining Team DeSantis.

  Because I am entitled to take the government dole, the prevailing favoritism whenever possible, I will support any, and every Democrat candidate.

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