7 Literary Works Fascist Book-Burners Are Trying To Ban | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    You've already seen the headlines - conservatives are trying to BAN BOOKS! Now, there is confirmation of this nefarious far-right plot to censor what American kids are allowed to read by removing them from school libraries while keeping them freely available everywhere else.

    With the help of the American Library Association, The Babylon Bee has obtained the following list of beautiful children's literature conservative fascists are trying to ban:

1. Dahmer - The Graphic Novel: Why won't those crazy right-wingers let kids read an educational comic book?
2. Beauty & The Beastiality: No child should be deprived of the chance to enjoy this classic tale of romance and unspeakably unnatural acts.
3. How To Make A Homemade Bomb And Do Fentanyl With A Stranger Without Your Parents Finding Out: Can you believe those fascists don't want kids to read this?
4. The Necronomicon: A beloved literary work filled with demon resurrection passages compiled by a race of beings known as The Dark Ones. And puritanical conservatives want to deprive our children of this knowledge!
5. If You Give A Lizzo A Banana: Perfect for bedtime, this book about body positivity and fruit abuse should be read by every small child.
6. Of Mice And Trans-Men: An inspiring turn-of-the-century tale combining migrant workers and radical gender theory.
7. Yaroslav Hunka - A Profile In Courage: This real-life story of a Canadian-honored military hero will help children become everything they can be.

    Now tell us - what on earth is so harmful about those books? Read them to your kids while you can, before those dangerous culture-destroying conservatives burn them all!