Biden Condemns Menendez For Taking Bribes In Gold Rather Than Fungible Assets Laundered By 20 Different Shell Companies | Eastern NC Now

With Democratic Senator Bob Menendez facing charges of bribery, President Biden weighed in this morning, condemning the Senator for accepting his bribes in bars of gold rather than fungible assets laundered through 20 shell companies.

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    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON, D.C.     With Democratic Senator Bob Menendez facing charges of bribery, President Biden weighed in this morning, condemning the Senator for accepting his bribes in bars of gold rather than fungible assets laundered through 20 shell companies.

    "Gold? That's a real rookie move, Jack!" said Biden to reporters. "If you're gonna get rich off a bribe, you gotta have money wired to several different shell companies in Ukraine which will then launder the money and wire it to your son in exchange for a painting, who will then buy some expensive items, and give you your cut. Come on, man! This ain't rocket surgery! Don't they launder money in Mexico or wherever this Menendez guy is from?"

    Sources say suspicions around Menendez first arose when he started trying to pay for bags of chips in the Capitol cafeteria with gold doubloons.

    Federal investigators confirmed Menendez is now facing several serious charges of receiving bribes in an overly obvious way while not being a member of the Biden family. "We will pursue these charges to the best of our ability," said Attorney General Merrick Garland. "Fortunately, Menendez is the only politician in Washington who has ever received a bribe, so we believe this problem is now contained."

    At publishing time, Hunter Biden had been seen by witnesses desperately trying to pawn off a wheelbarrow full of gold at a corner pawn shop in DC.

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After nearly 8 months of the United States House of Representatives' Oversight Committee hearings, House Speaker Mike Johnson is pursuing an Impeachment Inquiry into the strong allegations of Bribery, Influence Peddling, Money laundering and possible Treason regarding the Biden Family Shell Corporations' business dealings with foreign nations that are adversarial to our survival: Is it prudent and wise for the Republican controlled U.S. House to investigate this Democratic Socialist President?
  No, Democratics should never be investigated because they are so superior to their Republican counterparts, and care so much more.
  Yes, in a Constitutional Republic, bound by the Rule of Law, no one is above the law, and that law must be applied evenly.
  Not sure ... Now, what got all this started?
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