'You Know, These Fine Citizens May Really Have A Point And I'd Like To Learn More About Their Cause,' Thinks Driver Blocked By Protesters For 3 Hours | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on Eastern NC NOW with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    LOS ANGELES, CA     A local man had his entire worldview radically altered today, coming to a revelatory new conclusion on geopolitical affairs after being stuck in traffic for three hours due to protesters blocking the freeway.

    "You know, these fine citizens may really have a point and I'd like to learn more about their cause," said Jeff Garrison as he sat behind the wheel of his car in gridlock traffic on the way to LAX. "So what if I missed my flight back home to visit family for what will likely be Grandma's last holiday season? My mind has been enlightened! Thank you, traffic-blocking protesters!"

    Garrison was planning to fly to his parents' home in the Midwest to ring in the New Year but found himself sitting in his car for several hours on the 405 freeway while a group of pro-Palestine protesters sat across all lanes of traffic. "This is truly a brilliant tactic," he said. "I never would have considered their viewpoint before, but now that they have completely ruined my plans and made my life more difficult, I'm far more inclined to agree with them."

    The protesters were reportedly pleased with their foolproof strategy of making everyone mad at them. "It's such an intelligent way to get our point across," said one protester. "There's nothing that will make people more willing to listen to us than making their lives more difficult and getting them really, really angry."

    At publishing time, experts agreed the path to world peace would likely be paved with traffic-blocking protesters.
Go Back

Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published)
Enter Your Comment ( no code or urls allowed, text only please )

Major media claims jihadist terrorism is due to ''climate change'' Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Colorado Bans Trump From Running Over Concerns Usual Election Rigging System Could Fail


Latest Op-Ed & Politics

“Squad” member Rep. Ayanna Pressley (D-MA) accused Walgreens of racism after the company closed a pharmacy in her district.
Governor Cooper and NCDHHS Secretary Kody Kinsley Joined Doctors, Advocates and New Beneficiaries at Enrollment Fair in Charlotte
Multiple people were shot and at least one was killed when gunfire erupted at a parade celebrating the Kansas City Chiefs’ Super Bowl win this week.
Guilford County is considering an additional 1% Prepared Food and Beverage Tax, with the support of Greensboro Mayor Nancy Vaughan.
“Sound of Freedom” beat out Taylor Swift’s “The Eras Tour” movie to finish in the top ten of 2023 box office tallies domestically.
A local marriage is reportedly on the rocks after a woman expressed a desire to go on more dates with her husband, apparently forgetting he just took her to Costco yesterday.
follows Canadian province of Alberta adoptning Alberta Sovereignty Act last year


Charles Fain Lehman, fellow at the Manhattan Institute and contributing editor to City Journal, discusses his report, “Who Pays For Reparations? The Immigration Challenge in the Reparations Debate.”
Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis was in a personal relationship with special prosecutor Nathan Wade before she hired him in late 2021 for the 2020 election interference case against former President Donald Trump, a witness testified on Thursday.
Finding a good, Christian girl has never been harder. That's why The Babylon Bee is here to help out by offering you this tried and tested list of the absolute best places to look.
The U.S. Supreme Court ruled 5-4 on Monday that the Biden administration may cut through or tear down razor wire that the state of Texas has placed along the U.S.-Mexico border as it seeks to stop foreign nationals from illegally crossing into the U.S.
A prominent black radio show personality reportedly feels “burned” over his past support of Vice President Kamala Harris.
A three-judge panel of the North Carolina Court of Appeals heard arguments Tuesday in a suit brought by parents claiming that a Charlotte-area private school went woke and then expelled students of parents who disagreed.
Daily Wire Editor Emeritus Ben Shapiro slammed President Joe Biden’s response to a special counsel report showing that he had memory issues during an appearance on the Megyn Kelly show on Friday where they also discussed his new docu-series, “The Divided States of Biden.”


Authorities announced they had no choice but to put down Stephen Colbert after the late-night host tragically went mad from rabies last week.
House impeachment articles filed against Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas over his handling of the border crisis may be in jeopardy as at least one Republican says that he will oppose them, and others have yet to come to a decision.
President Joe Biden’s son, Hunter Biden, allegedly took photographs with his phone of “apparent” cocaine, crack cocaine, and other drug paraphernalia, according to court documents filed by Biden’s Department of Justice.
On Wednesday, state lawmakers released newly drawn maps for congressional districts and state House and Senate districts.
“The Chosen” dropped a fiery new trailer on Thursday that gives fans a sneak peek at what to expect in the upcoming episodes in Season 4, which will be shown in theaters.
What began as a pleasant seminar at Lakewood Church devolved into an awkward situation today, as Senior Pastor Joel Osteen was stumped by one attendee who asked him to name three books from the Bible.
A federally funded effort to make biology classes 'inclusive' for transgender students blasts the belief that there are two genders as 'inaccurate'
How you vote will determine how much your taxes will go up


Back to Top