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Results found for "theology"


After many heated debates over matters of theology, doctrine, and church carpet color, Lutherans have all finally agreed to split and form his or her own individual synod.
Published: Thursday, June 15th, 2023 @ 1:04 pm By: Babylon Bee
After many heated debates over matters of theology, doctrine, and church carpet color, Lutherans have all finally agreed to split and form his or her own individual synod.
 
A concerned husband assured his wife on Wednesday he was only reading Song of Solomon to study profound theological doctrine, not to check out the...er... you know..."interesting" bits.
Published: Sunday, June 11th, 2023 @ 12:56 am By: Babylon Bee
A concerned husband assured his wife on Wednesday he was only reading Song of Solomon to study profound theological doctrine, not to check out the...er... you know..."interesting" bits.
 
It would appear the end of the world has been postponed long enough for former child environmental star Greta Thunberg to be awarded an honorary doctorate from the University of Helsinki.
Published: Tuesday, April 4th, 2023 @ 3:06 pm By: Daily Wire
It would appear the end of the world has been postponed long enough for former child environmental star Greta Thunberg to be awarded an honorary doctorate from the University of Helsinki.
 
Theologians at the Claremont School of Theology put forward additional evidence that God has a sense of humor by pointing out that 1 out of every 20 pistachios tastes like flaming hot garbage.
Published: Tuesday, January 31st, 2023 @ 9:09 am By: Babylon Bee
Theologians at the Claremont School of Theology put forward additional evidence that God has a sense of humor by pointing out that 1 out of every 20 pistachios tastes like flaming hot garbage.
 
Scholars at Notre Dame's Department of Theology have found new evidence that the forbidden fruit described in Genesis was not actually a fruit, but a vial of deadly, highly processed seed oil.
Scholars at Notre Dame's Department of Theology have found new evidence that the forbidden fruit described in Genesis was not actually a fruit, but a vial of deadly, highly processed seed oil.
 
Experts in attendance at Friday's International Conference on Metaphysics and Theology were wowed as a panel on Jesus' miracles concluded that the miracle of feeding 5,000 people with "five little loaves and two little fish" was made possible thanks to Olive Garden's breadsticks.
Experts in attendance at Friday's International Conference on Metaphysics and Theology were wowed as a panel on Jesus' miracles concluded that the miracle of feeding 5,000 people with "five little loaves and two little fish" was made possible thanks to Olive Garden's breadsticks.
 
In history, the classical period includes the civilization of the Greeks and Romans who gave us classical art, architecture and classic languages of Greek and Latin.
Published: Friday, August 12th, 2022 @ 5:32 pm By: Gary Carlton
In history, the classical period includes the civilization of the Greeks and Romans who gave us classical art, architecture and classic languages of Greek and Latin.
 
Show us a pulpit, and you've shown us everything we need to know about its pastor. In fact, our panel of theology experts on staff at The Babylon Bee have the God-given ability to judge with 99.97% accuracy the theology of a church just based on its pulpit.
Published: Monday, July 18th, 2022 @ 2:17 pm By: Babylon Bee
Show us a pulpit, and you've shown us everything we need to know about its pastor. In fact, our panel of theology experts on staff at The Babylon Bee have the God-given ability to judge with 99.97% accuracy the theology of a church just based on its pulpit.
 
Depending on who you ask there are many ways to say grace before a meal. You show us how you pray when gathered with others and we'll tell you what that says about your theology.
Published: Monday, May 30th, 2022 @ 12:55 pm By: Babylon Bee
Depending on who you ask there are many ways to say grace before a meal. You show us how you pray when gathered with others and we'll tell you what that says about your theology.
 
Jesus is literally all over the Marvel movies. Everywhere you turn, there's another Christ figure. And as we all know, the best place to get our theology is from Marvel films.
Published: Thursday, April 21st, 2022 @ 12:11 pm By: Babylon Bee
Jesus is literally all over the Marvel movies. Everywhere you turn, there's another Christ figure. And as we all know, the best place to get our theology is from Marvel films.
 
Loosely defined, the phrase “liberal arts” refers to courses in Western philosophy, theology, literature, art, and history, with science and foreign languages playing a real but secondary role.
Loosely defined, the phrase “liberal arts” refers to courses in Western philosophy, theology, literature, art, and history, with science and foreign languages playing a real but secondary role.
 
The chickens have come home to roost at Duke’s Divinity School. Protesting students claim the school is insufficiently diverse. More needs to be done, they say, to combat racism, transphobia, homophobia, and associated evils.
The chickens have come home to roost at Duke’s Divinity School. Protesting students claim the school is insufficiently diverse. More needs to be done, they say, to combat racism, transphobia, homophobia, and associated evils.
 

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