POLL: 52% Of Nation Now Desire To Ditch Republic, Establish Monarchy With Ultra MAGA King | Beaufort County Now | The results of a CNN poll revealed that 52% of Americans are in favor of abolishing the nation's Democratic Republic in favor of a monarchy ruled by an Ultra MAGA King.

Coronavirus Disease 2019 (COVID-19)
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    U.S.     The results of a CNN poll revealed that 52% of Americans are in favor of abolishing the nation's Democratic Republic in favor of a monarchy ruled by an Ultra MAGA King. Another 39%-mostly bureaucrats-are reportedly satisfied with the current system of government.

    The poll findings, released Thursday, have alarmed both Democrats and Republicans in government who are reportedly "shook" that citizens don't appreciate them.

    "I don't know why anyone would trade in an oppressive and corrupt totalitarian government for a monarchy ruled by divine right," said Rep Adam Schiff. "Frankly, I'm shocked people don't appreciate how much we lie to them about everything for their own good while raising their taxes and sending it to Ukraine."

    "We do it because we care!"

    Former presidential candidate Jeb Bush emerged from obscurity to call MAGA King Trump a "jerk" who has set a dangerous precedent of not betraying the people who voted for him.

    "Please clap," he then added.

    According to Trump, it doesn't matter what anyone thinks because he is already king. "I've been imbued with huge power from on high. Just tremendous power," he said. "Power that Sleepy Joe could only dream of-and, believe me, he does a lot because he's always sleepy."

    Trump then spent an hour making fun of how old and dumb President Biden is, which effectively distracted him from assuming authority and doing anything. Experts claim this is what makes Trump so likable.

    "Our MAGA King is so focused on making fun of people that he doesn't have time left over to actually do anything, which is perfect because that's when leaders mess things up," said average citizen Joe Pleasant of Vermont.

    "He's going to do great things for this kingdom by leaving us all alone."
Go Back


Latest Op-Ed & Politics

Have you heard the latest? Uncle Joe is attempting to appropriate billions of dollars to a program designed to mandate that CRT is taught across the nation in OUR public schools.
Saule Omarova, Democrat President Joe Biden’s nominee for comptroller of the currency, has withdrawn her name from consideration for the position after facing increasing opposition to nomination over allegations that she was a Marxist.
The Federal Reserve announced an increase in interest rates Wednesday afternoon, boosting the cost of borrowing money by 0.75%, the largest increase in a single meeting in nearly 30 years.
Clarence Thomas tells us what we need to be working toward
Politicians in Washington are growing increasingly nervous, as the CDC has announced they have discovered the first case of Lizardpox on American shores.
Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen said on Sunday that suspending gas taxes is “certainly worth considering” amid rising energy prices.
Australia reportedly will not send officials to the 2022 Winter Olympics in Beijing, China, in response to the communist nation’s genocide against religious minorities.
To what extent can a selective educational institution advantage certain racial groups in admissions decisions without discriminating against other groups simultaneously?
Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen on Sunday blamed global factors for Americans’ spiraling purchasing power and declared a recession is “not at all inevitable,” despite a growing consensus the U.S. could soon find out one is already underway.


With the price of food skyrocketing and the value of Bitcoin plummeting, McDonald's restaurants across the world have rolled out a new value menu in which all items cost only 1 Bitcoin.
Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) slammed President Joe Biden during a speech on the Senate floor Tuesday over the unfolding crisis in Ukraine. Tens of thousands of Russian soldiers have been amassing near its border in what experts warn might be a prelude to an invasion.
The North Carolina State Health Plan and the National Academy for State Health Policy Find that North Carolina's Dominant Hospital Systems Recorded Billions of Dollars in Profits After Taking Taxpayer-Funded COVID Relief
Governor Ron DeSantis (R-FL) got some unexpected praise late this week from media personality Bill Maher, who insisted that DeSantis would be better than former President Donald Trump.
Milestone Air Quality Legislation Paved Way for Significant Environmental and Clean Energy Efforts
White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki took a shot at Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) during Tuesday’s press briefing over remarks that Ocasio-Cortez made about organized retail theft incidents that have plagued several major Democrat-controlled cities in recent weeks.
The United States of America has edged closer and closer to the Leftist maxim of "Abortion on Demand" whenever it is demanded, by whomever demands it, but now that ease of operation to alleviate oneself of that nagging little problem has come to a screeching halt.


the perverts are sexually grooming children with these drag queen events
The Department of Justice (DOJ) apparently blocked Republican senators from questioning a U.S. attorney on an ongoing federal investigation into President Joe Biden’s son, Hunter.
North Carolina Democratic Gov. Roy Cooper signed three bills into law yesterday, June 14, including one that legalizes FDA-approved THC medications.
SpaceX employees circulated an open letter criticizing CEO Elon Musk for his “behavior in the public sphere.” Those employees now find themselves out of a job, according to a Friday report from The New York Times.
there is one of the 14 RINOs who still faces a Senate primary


Back to Top