Border Town Puts Up 'Martha's Vineyard' Sign In Hopes Government Will Come Pick Up All Their Illegal Immigrants | Eastern NC Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    DEL RIO, TX     Impressed by the efficiency of Martha's Vineyard in expelling their migrants in less than 48 hours, several border towns in Texas have begun adopting best practices from the affluent Massachusetts island. One prominent change that Del Rio has already made is replacing their "Welcome To Del Rio" sign with a "Welcome To Martha's Vineyard" sign so that migrants will know that there are not enough resources, they are not wanted, and they need to leave immediately.

    "We've never seen anything like it - the Martha's Vineyard team had the migrants gone in 48 hours flat! We haven't ever been able to put up numbers like that, so we're taking a page out of their playbook." Del Rio resident Dee Porter spoke to reporters about the "Unwelcome Committee" that the town has formed to study the methods used at Martha's Vineyard for migrant removal.

    While Del Rio's new Unwelcome Committee has implemented some more creative methods for making the migrants feel unwelcome, they confirmed that adding the "Welcome to Martha's Vineyard" sign was priority number one, since Martha's Vineyard was the original inspiration for forming the committee and remains the "gold standard" for speedy migrant removal. Del Rio has already started playing the song "Closing Time" on the town's PA system as well and placed orders for flashing neon signs that say "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here" in the "arrivals" section of the airport.

    Other border towns have taken similar approaches, with Rio Grande City also taking a page out of the Martha's Vineyard playbook by calling in the national guard to remove the migrants. The national guard responded in record time when they saw the "Welcome to Martha's Vineyard" sign and thought that a Democratic vacation town was being inundated rather than "the usual flyover state that can probably handle it anyway."

    At publishing time, the Justice Department has launched an investigation of the border towns that have begun using the methods that Martha's Vineyard used to remove their migrants since those methods are only supposed to be for rich white Democratic strongholds.

poll#162

In what may be the most divisive period in modern American History, even more divisive than the turbulent sixties due to today's lack of patriotism, consider what are the major catalysts causing so much of this calamity of conflict, and vote: What most instigates the division of America, on this day September 20, 2022?

  Racism within our society

  Sex realignment to the detriment of our society.

  Biden /Harris Wide Open Southern Border Policy for the Demographic Upheaval of OUR Constitutional Republic

  Rampant Crime in Democratic controlled cities, and the possible contagion elsewhere

  Covid Pandemic, and its mishandling at the political, and bureaucratic levels.

  The unresolved questions /allegation regarding the flawed 2020 General Election

  January 6th Riot or "Armed Insurrection", depending upon patriotic perspective

  Joe Biden as Divisive Leader; Ineffective and Corrupt Executive

  Failed Education Industry, from an overall perspective, regarding all levels of education.

  Propagandistic Media in complete conflict with the First Amendment's guarantee of Freedom of Speech, and the awesome responsibility of a Free Press..

  "Orangeman Bad!"

  Bureaucracy rushing to a behemoth size, its unjustified expense, and far too often overreach.

  The Weaponized Deep State for political purposes

  A secular ambivalence to all that is real.

  Record number of overdose deaths from opioids and now Fentanyl

  Biden Administration's disastrous Foreign Policy

  Bidenflation /supply chain failure inevitably evolving into stagflation and recession.

  "Ultra MAGA Extremists" freely speaking louder AND LOUDER!

928 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#154

Inarguably, the policies of the Democrats in congress and Joe Biden as the Executive is plunging the United States into a recession, if we are not already there; a recession that was completely avoidable. Will abrupt changes in policies occur in time?

  Yes, the Democrats have a bold plan, yet to be revealed, to save us.

  No, there will have to be a complete undoing of the damage done by these Democrats.

  I can't do simple math, so how am I to understand the concept of basic economics.

1,216 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#132

Considering that Joe Biden is considered by so many to be the Imposter President: Is he actually knowledgeable enough, wise enough, patriotic enough to be this Constitutional Republic's president at this difficult point in these tumultuous times?

  Yes, Mr. Biden is thoughtful and kind, and just so different from the "Orange Man".

  No, this representation of "president" is either too corrupt, too stupid, or both to be a real president.

  I just want the fun guy, who knew how to make stuff work back.

670 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?