AOC Insists There Are No Hysterectomies Performed On Minors Because Most Of Them Are Too Busy In The Mines | Eastern NC Now

During a tense Congressional Hearing, deductive polymath Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez put a widespread conspiracy theory to rest when she vocally insisted that there were no hysterectomies being performed on minors because most of them are too busy working in the mines anyway.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON, D.C.     During a tense Congressional Hearing, deductive polymath Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez put a widespread conspiracy theory to rest when she vocally insisted that there were no hysterectomies being performed on minors because most of them are too busy working in the mines anyway.

    The truth-filled gavel drop utterly destroyed the claim by conservatives that the Boston Children's Hospital was performing the irreparable surgeries on minors.

    "How can minors find the time to travel via minecart to far-away Boston when they're busy mining for coal, iron, and lapis lazuli," explained Ocasio-Cortez to an awestruck chamber. "And it's not just minors who aren't getting hysterectomies; neither are lumberjacks, farmers, nor blacksmiths."

    The phenom of reason and intellect then adjusted her smart-looking glasses and conceded that yes, some villagers did receive hysterectomies, but only if they had enough emeralds, which were hard to come by because they were "even more rarer than diamonds."

    At publishing time, Rep. Ocasio-Cortez had stunned all by pointing out hysterectomies weren't even real because no one had hysters in their bodies in the first place.

poll#164
It has been far too many years since the Woke theology interlaced its canons within the fabric of the Indoctrination Realm, so it is nigh time to ask: Does this Representative Republic continue, as a functioning society of a self-governed people, by contending with the unusual, self absorbed dictates of the Woke, and their vast array of Victimhood scenarios?
  Yes, the Religion of Woke must continue; there are so many groups of underprivileged, underserved, a direct result of unrelenting Inequity; they deserve everything.
  No; the Woke fools must be toppled from their self-anointed pedestal; a functioning society of a good Constitutional people cannot withstand this level of "existential" favoritism as it exists now.
  I just observe; with this thoughtful observation: What will happen "when the Vikings are breeching our walls;" how do the Woke react?
848 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

Go Back


Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published )
Enter Your Comment ( text only please )




Oh No! Israelite Lamb Realizes He Doesn't Have Any Spots Or Blemishes Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics 12 Rich People Tell Us Their #1 Investment


HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic
she was actually 86, and says she did not vote in the 51 elections records show
"We are leveraging counterterrorism tools and global partnerships to deter this threat before it metastasizes," an official shared.
The impressions of our youth are indelibly branded in our hearts and minds. As I think of June 6, 1944 (D Day) it always seems that it was my war. I was nine years old.

HbAD1

Not giving our kids their own devices was one of the best parenting decisions my husband and I made.
far left group denounced conservatives as nazis but they were funding REAL nazis
How federal policies influenced family formation and the mid-20th century baby boom — and could do so again.
many sheriffs also refusing to enforce it, as lawsuits against state proliferate

HbAD2

days after migrant bus driver who could not speak English killed 5 and injured 44 in VA
want illegal aliens who have committed crimes in America to stay

HbAD3

 
 
Back to Top