'The U.S. Is Not A Banana Republic,' Says Biden While Showing Off Cool New Uniform | Eastern North Carolina Now

In an address to the nation, El Presidente Biden showed off his cool new uniform covered with flashy medals and assured the nation that the U.S. is not a banana republic.

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON, D.C.     In an address to the nation, El Presidente Biden showed off his cool new uniform covered with flashy medals and assured the nation that the U.S. is not a banana republic.

    "Listen, folks, this is ridiculous," said El Presidente as machine gun fire went off in the background. "Just because I'm using the corrupt power of my administration to prosecute a political opponent, doesn't mean we are a banana republic. We're a nation of laws and freedom! If you weren't free, would I be wearing my beautiful gold Presidential Medal of Freedom right now? I think not!"

    Media outlets praised Biden's bold and impressive new look. "It's as if the shiny gold of Dear Leader's well-deserved medals are signaling a new dawn for our country and all humanity," said CNN anchor Wolf Blitzer. "For the first time, I feel safe, wrapped in the loving arms of our Lord Ruler. Blessings be upon him!"

    Sources say Biden's political opponent, Donald Trump, is finally being held responsible for the egregious crime of having classified documents while not being a member of the ruling party. "I AM THE MOST PERSECUTED PERSON WHO HAS EVER LIVED," said Trump in an all-caps rant on TRUTH Social. "NO ONE HAS EVER BEEN MORE MISTREATED THAN I HAVE. THIS IS A PHONY WITCH HUNT AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT!"

    Sources confirmed Trump is scheduled to disappear mysteriously next Tuesday.

    At publishing time, the Biden Regime reiterated that the U.S. is not a banana republic and that anyone who says otherwise will be indicted and then shot.
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Comments

Big Bob said:
( June 16th, 2023 @ 3:58 pm )
 
( June 16th, 2023 @ 10:12 am )
 
Big Bob: Among all the STUPID stuff you work hard to communicate, this falls just short of your recent crowning achievement, but a solid #2.
Big Bob said:
( June 16th, 2023 @ 9:52 am )
 
The tape exists. The question is, will it be admitted as evidence. If it is, trump is toast. However I never underestimate how rich , white, men have certain advantages in the legal system. Time will tell.
( June 16th, 2023 @ 6:46 am )
 
Sure it is Big Bob; just right over there in the Russia Hoax bin of Democratic Socialists' whining points.
Big Bob said:
( June 15th, 2023 @ 10:03 am )
 
I know a tape exists . Even Mike Pence knows it.
( June 14th, 2023 @ 11:05 pm )
 
Oh my gosh, you don't know, do you Big Bob?

You are stating serious allegations of a confession built on a "You Don't Know."

I thought for a moment that I did not know something very material, and as a man of great humility, I was hopeful that you would enlighten me, but "You Don't Know."
Big Bob said:
( June 14th, 2023 @ 10:59 pm )
 
Stan, I'm prett sure you have access to the internet.
( June 14th, 2023 @ 7:50 pm )
 
Then what tape is it if everyone has heard it?

I have not heard it, obviously, and what did he confess to?
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