Reformed Church Decides To Spice It Up And Play Something More Modern From 1901 | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    FALLBROOK, CA     In an effort to be more sensitive to modern churchgoers, the elders at the Reformed church in Fallbrook decided to spice things up during their worship service by playing some more modern, hip music from the early twentieth century.

    "We know that modern audiences are accustomed to more upbeat, catchy tunes," said Elder Dean Van Dijkstra. "We are trying to be all things to all people so that the gospel might reach some."

    The service bulletin caused a stir when the church saw a section for "Special Music" listing This Is My Father's World written in 1901, which, as everybody knows, is after the special dispensation of 18th and 19th-century classic hymns with actual theology in them and long after the authorized psalms of David were written in 1000 BC.

    Not everyone was happy with the new music selection.

    "We were already meeting modern churchgoers halfway when we set the Psalms to tunes from the 18th and 19th century," said deacon and church greeter Brad Van Holland. "This is just too far. It's sad to see the church move in such a worldly direction."

    At publishing time, Brad had decided it was the last straw after elders decided to change the absolute fire 16th-century tune to his favorite Psalm 103.