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Former Congressman Ron Paul was spotted muttering nervously to himself today while standing in line to see Santa Claus at a nearby shopping mall, as he hoped this would finally be the year he would get what he wanted by asking for the 47th consecutive year for Santa to end the Fed
Published: Wednesday, March 20th, 2024 @ 10:50 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Jolly old Saint Nick has decided to shake things up this Christmas season by increasing the consequences for naughty children. Instead of lumps of coal, misbehaving kids will find themselves unwrapping something even worse: a copy of The Marvels on Blu-ray.
Published: Thursday, February 22nd, 2024 @ 8:57 am
By: Babylon Bee
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SANTA ANA, CA — A local professing Christian notified his friends, family members, and everyone who attended his church that, while he was not removing Jesus from his life, he was leaving religion behind.
Published: Sunday, February 18th, 2024 @ 7:40 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Think Santa Claus is just some fictional character conjured up to take attention away from baby Jesus? WRONG!
Published: Thursday, February 1st, 2024 @ 12:46 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Target executives announced this week the most intersectional Santa decoration ever, a limbless and not-so-jolly blob of an elf.
Published: Saturday, January 20th, 2024 @ 1:36 am
By: Babylon Bee
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RALEIGH: As children across North Carolina eagerly await Christmas Eve tonight, North Carolina Emergency Management (NCEM) officials briefed Gov. Cooper on state preparations to monitor Santa’s progress and offer any assistance necessary as he delivers presents to homes across the world.
Published: Tuesday, December 26th, 2023 @ 8:28 am
By: Governor's Office
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RALEIGH: With Christmas right around the corner, Governor Roy Cooper and North Carolina Emergency Management (NCEM) will once again be monitoring Santa’s progress as he approaches North Carolina.
Published: Friday, December 22nd, 2023 @ 8:33 am
By: Governor's Office
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Rock legend Carlos Santana paused his New Jersey concert in late July to talk to his audience about an issue that was apparently close to his heart. In a speech that critics attacked as “anti-trans,” the famed guitarist said, “A woman is a woman and a man is a man. That’s it.”
Published: Sunday, September 17th, 2023 @ 3:56 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Pulitzer-Prize-winning author and preeminent voice of American literature Cormac McCarthy died at 89 years old of natural causes on Tuesday at his home in Santa Fe, New Mexico.
Published: Saturday, July 1st, 2023 @ 11:43 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Alec Baldwin scored a substantial legal victory Monday when the Santa Fe County, New Mexico, district attorney dropped the gun enhancement charge against the actor in the case over the shooting death of “Rust” cinematographer Halyna Hutchins.
Published: Monday, February 27th, 2023 @ 9:11 am
By: Daily Wire
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Renowned astro-physicist Neil deGrasse Tyson delivered an unsolicited science lesson on Christmas Eve, using his own research to “prove” that Santa Claus’ holiday delivery schedule was an impossibility.
Published: Thursday, January 5th, 2023 @ 10:54 pm
By: Daily Wire
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KYIV — Somber news came out of war-torn Ukraine today as reports confirmed Santa Claus's sleigh had been mistaken for a hostile Russian aircraft and was shot down by a Ukrainian surface-to-air missile as it flew over the greater Kyiv area early this morning.
Published: Tuesday, January 3rd, 2023 @ 10:42 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Greenpeace's vision of Father Christmas is a shabbily dressed Kris Kringle, who appears to be appropriately 'down on his luck', and at his 'wits end' relative to his immediate climate - it is too warm where he lives - the North Pole.
Published: Wednesday, December 28th, 2022 @ 2:47 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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The Good Lovelies are in the Christmas Spirit, and we are too. "Santa Baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight."
Published: Monday, December 26th, 2022 @ 6:18 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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Who knew that "Dirty Jobs" icon Mike Rowe had such an outstanding melodious voice to go along with his trademark hyper energetic work ethic?
Published: Monday, December 26th, 2022 @ 1:30 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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I have long felt that Greg Lake / Pete Sinfield 's "I believe in Father Christmas" is one of the more creative modern Christmas songs created in my lifetime. I have never been a huge fan of Emerson, Lake and Palmer, but I am a big fan of Greg Lake's ode to the British Santa.
Published: Sunday, December 25th, 2022 @ 12:57 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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Christmas time is in full swing with tree decorating, caroling, gift wrapping, and of course — the beloved tradition of traumatizing millions of small children everywhere by taking them to meet Santa Claus.
Published: Friday, December 23rd, 2022 @ 12:41 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Even though Louis Armstrong did sing some Christmas tunes, like "Zat You Santa Claus?"; however, I could not find any Christmas videos of a fine enough quality to display in BCN.
Published: Thursday, December 22nd, 2022 @ 3:25 am
By: Wyatt Sanderman Day
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Actor Tim Allen said he’s “better as Santa Claus” than in any other role as he praised his new Disney+ series, “The Santa Clauses,” for remembering that Christmas is about a Christian holiday.
Published: Wednesday, December 21st, 2022 @ 2:24 am
By: Daily Wire
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Local dad Michael Cochran explained to his kids that this year, he felt confident that Santa would rather find some beer and cigars waiting at the bottom of the chimney than milk and cookies.
Published: Monday, December 19th, 2022 @ 8:10 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Elon Musk finalized the purchase of Santa's Workshop this week and immediately released internal e-mails which show how the naughty and nice lists were created.
Published: Wednesday, December 14th, 2022 @ 2:11 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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It may have been a long time ago and probably today seems corny, but how many of you remember trying to sneak down to get a peek at Santa Claus.
Published: Wednesday, December 14th, 2022 @ 12:05 pm
By: Bobby Tony
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Christmas 2023 has been canceled after Sam Brinton stole Santa Claus' sack. Brinton, Deputy Assistant Secretary of the Office of Spent Fuel, was seen on security footage taking the sack from Ted Stevens Anchorage International Airport on Saturday afternoon.
Published: Wednesday, December 14th, 2022 @ 11:57 am
By: Babylon Bee
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A small commotion broke out and stopped Christmas shoppers in their tracks at a local mall today, as Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelensky was seen sitting on the mall Santa's lap and overheard asking for an additional $50 billion in funding for his nation's ongoing war against Russia.
Published: Wednesday, December 14th, 2022 @ 1:37 am
By: Babylon Bee
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A spokesman for Santa's Workshop today announced the organization's latest advance in their ongoing efforts to determine who's naughty and who's nice
Published: Friday, December 2nd, 2022 @ 6:07 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Multiple people are reported dead after two small airplanes collided in mid air as they were attempting to land at the Watsonville Municipal Airport in Santa Cruz, California, Thursday afternoon.
Published: Wednesday, August 31st, 2022 @ 2:18 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Famed guitarist Carlos Santana collapsed on stage during his concert Tuesday night in Michigan, and the crowd was reportedly told to pray for the rock and roll star who was suffering from a “serious medical issue.”
Published: Saturday, July 16th, 2022 @ 7:20 pm
By: Daily Wire
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President Joe Biden was widely mocked online on Friday afternoon after he agreed with a man who called in to the North American Aerospace Defense Command’s (NORAD) annual holiday Santa tracking event and said, “Let’s go, Brandon,” a phrase that means “F*** Joe Biden.”
Published: Saturday, January 1st, 2022 @ 9:06 am
By: Daily Wire
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Ho Ho Ho… Someone Will Still Be on His Way
Published: Thursday, December 24th, 2020 @ 3:19 am
By: Governor's Office
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I may be the last one to know about this group: the Fraternal Order of Real Bearded Santas.
Published: Tuesday, October 27th, 2020 @ 7:22 pm
By: John Locke Foundation
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It’s not too early to wonder whether Santa Claus will be able to slink down the chimney this Christmas and deliver toys to all the good boys and girls of the world.
Published: Monday, September 28th, 2020 @ 12:44 pm
By: Daily Wire
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The White House Coronavirus Task Force today recommended 30-day mitigation strategies for Seattle-King, Pierce, and Snohomish County, Washington, and Santa Clara County, California due to widespread transmission of coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19).
Published: Thursday, March 12th, 2020 @ 2:37 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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On December 4, a Mississippi family experienced a chilling and horrifying invasion of their privacy when someone used the Ring security camera in their daughters’ bedroom to speak their eight-year-old daughter, say he was Santa Claus, and encourage them to act in destructive ways.
Published: Tuesday, December 17th, 2019 @ 10:28 pm
By: Daily Wire
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I will bet you can't watch this without singing along in you head.
Published: Monday, December 16th, 2019 @ 9:02 pm
By: Bobby Tony
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North Carolina’s unemployment rate has dropped from the 10.9 percent 2010 high we experienced following The Great Recession to 4.0 percent in October. But that’s not uniform across the state.
Published: Friday, December 13th, 2019 @ 7:46 pm
By: Tom Campbell
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Yesterday, President Donald J. Trump made additional disaster assistance available to the Santa Clara Pueblo by authorizing an increase in the level of Federal funding for Public Assistance
Published: Wednesday, November 13th, 2019 @ 7:18 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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Yesterday, President Donald J. Trump made additional disaster assistance available to the Santa Clara Pueblo
Published: Tuesday, November 12th, 2019 @ 6:54 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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The Sport of Kings is under renewed scrutiny due to a long list of horse deaths at famed Southern California racetrack Santa Anita.
Published: Wednesday, October 2nd, 2019 @ 5:15 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Back in 1897, an eight-year-old girl, prompted by naysaying friends, wrote The New York Sun wanting the truth about the existence of Santa Claus. Today that letter might be answered by apparent congressman-elect Mark Harris, confirming not only Santa's existence...
Published: Thursday, December 6th, 2018 @ 8:39 am
By: Tom Campbell
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Teresa Forbes, a graduate of Dunwoody HS who will attend Valdosta State University in the Fall, wrote this week's column.
Published: Thursday, August 2nd, 2018 @ 1:06 am
By: Kathy Manos Penn
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