10 Telltale Signs You're About To Get Raided By The FBI | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

Publisher's Note: This series of posts on this one issue - The Unprecedented FBI Raid of President Trump's Mar-a-Lago Estate - can all be found here on ENC NOW.

    From investigating school board parents to raiding Mar-a-Lago, the FBI is on a rampage! Who will they raid next? It could be you!

    To help you protect yourself, The Babylon Bee has consulted law enforcement experts to learn the top 10 signs the FBI is about to kick your door down:

1. A windowless van labeled "Fiber Board Installers" has been parked outside your house all week: And there's a satellite dish on the roof. Weird.
2. The bush in your front yard is a foot closer to the house every time you look at it: You could've sworn it was by the road when you planted it. Are those eyes?!
3. You were dumb enough to engage in drug and sex trafficking without being Biden's son: Classic rookie mistake!
4. Your door dash delivery guy is showered and clean-shaven: He's clearly a Fed.
5. Your wife keeps shooing pesky FBI agents rummaging through her closet: Too late! You're already being raided!
6. You were the president and took the nuclear codes home with you: Hopefully, they'll be lenient since you made America great again.
7. You attended a school board meeting in the last 12 weeks: You monster!
8. You're alone in your house and you sneeze and a mysterious voice behind the wall says "bless you": At least they're polite.
9. The kid delivering your newspaper is clearly an adult midget with a 5 o'clock shadow dressed as a kid: Oops - sorry, we meant "little person."
10. You just clicked on this Babylon Bee article: Oh no! You're on the watchlist forever now!

poll#157

Was it a judicious ploy for Joe Biden's FBI to execute the unprecedented raid of President Trump's Mar-a-Lago estate?

  Yes; the Cheneys despise this former Republican president, and for good reason ... so they say.

  No; never has a former president been treated with this level of vindictive abuse by those temporarily in power.

  Who cares? It's Trump.

932 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#154

Inarguably, the policies of the Democrats in congress and Joe Biden as the Executive is plunging the United States into a recession, if we are not already there; a recession that was completely avoidable. Will abrupt changes in policies occur in time?

  Yes, the Democrats have a bold plan, yet to be revealed, to save us.

  No, there will have to be a complete undoing of the damage done by these Democrats.

  I can't do simple math, so how am I to understand the concept of basic economics.

1,216 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?