7 Ways Drag Shows Are Actually Good For Kids | Eastern NC Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    Many transphobic conservatives will refuse to send their sons and daughters to drag queen story hour just because they don't want a grown man in lingerie spending time with their kids. But did you know there are many benefits to drag shows?

    We consulted Queer Studies experts and David French to bring you the 7 reasons drag shows are actually good for your kids.

1. Nothing on Halloween will seem remotely scary anymore: Your kids will no longer run away and cry at that Jason costume after witnessing Priscilla Twerksalot in full makeup.
2. They'll definitely believe in the doctrine of total depravity: It's never too early to teach them sound theology.
3. It's an easy spot for cops to round up pedos: Obviously.
4. They'll have plenty to talk about in therapy later: Wouldn't want their expensive therapy sessions to be boring!
5. You can use it as a threat to keep them in line: "If you sass me one more time you're off to the drag show!"
6. Being exposed to Monkeypox at a young age helps develop natural immunity: Gotta build up those antibodies.
7. Since kids are little rebels, they'll end up rebelling against their insane groomer parents and becoming good, conservative traditionalists: Reverse psychology, baby!

    Well, what are you waiting for? Take your kids to a drag show today, and then please turn yourself in to the local police at once.

poll#164

It has been far too many years since the Woke theology interlaced its canons within the fabric of the Indoctrination Realm, so it is nigh time to ask: Does this Representative Republic continue, as a functioning society of a self-governed people, by contending with the unusual, self absorbed dictates of the Woke, and their vast array of Victimhood scenarios?

  Yes, the Religion of Woke must continue; there are so many groups of underprivileged, underserved, a direct result of unrelenting Inequity; they deserve everything.

  No; the Woke fools must be toppled from their self-anointed pedestal; a functioning society of a good Constitutional people cannot withstand this level of "existential" favoritism as it exists now.

  I just observe; with this thoughtful observation: What will happen "when the Vikings are breeching our walls;" how do the Woke react?

848 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#154

Inarguably, the policies of the Democrats in congress and Joe Biden as the Executive is plunging the United States into a recession, if we are not already there; a recession that was completely avoidable. Will abrupt changes in policies occur in time?

  Yes, the Democrats have a bold plan, yet to be revealed, to save us.

  No, there will have to be a complete undoing of the damage done by these Democrats.

  I can't do simple math, so how am I to understand the concept of basic economics.

1,216 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?