Shocking Study Shows More Kids Identifying As Members Of World’s Most Celebrated, Popular Group | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WORLD     A shocking Gallup poll has revealed that a rapidly increasing number of kids in Generation Z are now identifying as members of the world's most celebrated, popular group.

    "We're absolutely stunned by this," said sociologist Dr. Veg Dirgmann. "We can't begin to explain why young, impressionable kids who are desperate for popularity and affirmation are suddenly choosing to become members of the most popular and affirmed group in human history."

    "Every single movie, TV show, corporation, TikTok influencer, YouTuber, public school teacher, pop star, and Hollywood star in the country openly promotes and celebrates this group. Why on earth would teenagers want to be a part of that? It must be biology."

    Gallup results indicate almost 20% of GenZ identify as members of this culturally beloved movement, with the other 80% being pathetic losers. Sources say membership in the group is growing every year as pressure on young people to join the group from literally every single idol, peer, and authority figure in their lives continues to mount.

    "It used to be that kids had to be smart, good-looking, or athletic to be popular, but many are finding it much easier to simply identify as popular," said behavioral scientist Dr. Tim Thwain in response to the poll. "Dang, I sure wish I had that when I was young."

    At publishing time, the percentage of GenZ kids in the group increased to 35%.

    UPDATE: It is now 42%.

poll#164

It has been far too many years since the Woke theology interlaced its canons within the fabric of the Indoctrination Realm, so it is nigh time to ask: Does this Representative Republic continue, as a functioning society of a self-governed people, by contending with the unusual, self absorbed dictates of the Woke, and their vast array of Victimhood scenarios?

  Yes, the Religion of Woke must continue; there are so many groups of underprivileged, underserved, a direct result of unrelenting Inequity; they deserve everything.

  No; the Woke fools must be toppled from their self-anointed pedestal; a functioning society of a good Constitutional people cannot withstand this level of "existential" favoritism as it exists now.

  I just observe; with this thoughtful observation: What will happen "when the Vikings are breeching our walls;" how do the Woke react?

527 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#170

Considering what has happened to our Representative Republic since the corruptive orthodoxy that led to the tolerated abomination - The Russia Hoax - where felonies were perpetrated upon the American People by the creation of the Two Tiered Justice System, in the misnomer of "Social Justice:" Where do you stand on sustaining our constitutionally guaranteed freedoms in a society where injustice is chronically sanctioned by one political orthodoxy?

  I believe in a perfected society by employing a higher governmental authority to train the behavior of the public.

  The United States Constitution does not allow just a few freedoms, it guarantees ALL freedoms promised to Humankind by God.

  Just don't take away my Social Media.

302 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?