Terrified Paparazzi Photographer Starting To Think This Meghan Markle Girl Is Stalking Him | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    NEW YORK, NY     A terrified paparazzi photographer is asking for privacy following an altercation with the Duchess of Sussex in downtown NYC this week.

    Eddie Duarte, a freelance celebrity photographer, says he's beginning to suspect Meghan Markle is stalking him after he noticed the defunct royal following him while he was trying to have dinner with his family.

    "I just looked over and there she was, hiding behind a bush," Duarte told reporters. "What was really strange was, when I saw her, she immediately held up a sign with flashing lights that said 'I'm Meghan Markle! I'm oppressed!' It was weird."

    Duarte says Markle followed him throughout the evening in what he thinks was an attempt to get him to take photos of her. At one point, as Duarte and his family were driving home, Markle allegedly swerved her black SUV into his car in what bystanders describe as a 'near catastrophic accident'.

    "Look, I'm just out here doing my job, trying to make a living, and she's over there jumping in a photo I'm taking of Alec Baldwin and his 20 kids."

    In response to Duarte's accusations, Markle released a 30,000-word statement detailing her need for privacy along with her daily schedule and minute-by-minute agenda, in case any other Paparazzi want to take photos of her very private life.