Pelosi Announces Bid For Two More Years Of Insider Trading | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON, D.C.     In a surprise announcement, Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi confirmed she will be seeking reelection for yet another 2-year term of lucrative insider trading.

    "I have long served the people of San Francisco in Congress by enriching myself with privileged information while my hometown descends into chaos," said Pelosi in a statement. "With your support, I hope to continue my important work for another two years. Good morning, Sunday morning."

    The mayor of San Francisco celebrated the announcement on Friday. "Our city has long been a place of lawless greed and theft, and we're proud to see Mrs. Pelosi bring those values to Washington," said Mayor London Breed while brushing broken glass off the front seat of her car. "Give us two more years of Pelosi!"

    Pelosi vowed that if elected she would redouble her commitment to becoming filthy rich via insider trading in Washington and maybe even pay off her yacht and her 3rd summer home.

    At publishing time, Pelosi's husband Paul had also issued a statement, begging voters to please send his wife back to D.C. for a couple more years.
Go Back


Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published)
Enter Your Comment ( no code or urls allowed, text only please )




Jerkface Elon Musk Refuses To Help Start Nuclear War Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Thoughtful Toddler Empties All Items Out Of Every Drawer In The House So Mom Doesn't Have To


HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

replacing dependable coal with intermittant wind and solar may mean blackouts
populist right lawmaker not allowed to criticize EU's Green Deal
Biden's illegal rewrite destroys protection of women to pander to transgenders
It should be the People who make the essential decision(s)
Mark 8:15 And he charged them, saying, Take heed, beware of the leaven of the Pharisees, and of the leaven of Herod.
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

HbAD1

Majority also believe that prosecution by Bragg is a political witch hunt
Atheist Soros, although born Jewish, was Nazi collaborator in Hungary in WWII
anti-immigration conservative nationalist beats Social Democrat incumbent 2 to 1
Biden wants to push this in public schools and Gov. deSantis says NO
this at the time that pro-Hamas radicals are rioting around the country

HbAD2

populist / nationalist anti-immigration AfD most popular party among young voters, CDU second
Barr had previously said he would jump off a bridge before supporting Trump
illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic

HbAD3

 
Back to Top