Man Plays Relaxing Game Of 'Fallout' To Escape Reality Of America In 2023 | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on Eastern NC NOW with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    BUENA PARK, CA     As 2023 wound to a close, local man Luis Garcia decided to escape from the terrifying state of living in today's America by enjoying a nice, relaxing game of Fallout 3 on his gaming computer.

    "I just want to immerse myself in a better world," said Garcia as he munched on Takis and pounded a Mountain Dew, clicking frantically to fire on a band of raiders attacking his vault dweller wandering the post-apocalyptic landscape of Washington, D.C. "With everything that's going on in this country and around the world in 2023, I'd much rather spend my time hanging out in this hellscape." He gestured toward his computer screen. "It's better than hanging out in this hellscape." He gestured toward the real world and shuddered.

    "I don't have to worry about inflation, wokeness, or the latest government attempt to erode our rights away," Thompson explained while having his character pop some Rad-X. "Sure, the radiation levels are through the roof, but at least there's no Biden presidency here."

    According to sources, Garcia says that instead of stressing out about the cost of living crisis, the looming threat of World War III, and who will win the presidency in 2024, he prefers the much more pleasant experience of fighting for his life against raiders, radiation storms, and man-eating Super Mutants.

    "While others are addicted to the latest gossip of who Taylor Swift is dating today, I'd rather be addicted to Chems as I navigate a ghoul-infested, irradiated, heavily booby-trapped sewer system," added Garcia. "I'll take my chances with Deathclaws over Swifties any day."


    At publishing time, it was announced that the U.S. currency system had collapsed entirely, resulting in a world where everyone would be forced to barter and trade for goods and services using bottlecaps. Garcia just shrugged and shouted for his wife to bring more Takis.
Go Back

Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published)
Enter Your Comment ( no code or urls allowed, text only please )

Canada Requires All Men's Rooms To Have Tampons In Case Of Justin Trudeau Visit Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Nation's White Liberals Wish Each Other Happy Kwanzaa


Latest Op-Ed & Politics

Biden abuses power to turn statute on its head; womens groups to sue
The Missouri Senate approved a constitutional amendment to ban non-U.S. citizens from voting and also ban ranked-choice voting.
Democrats prosecuting political opponets just like foreign dictrators do
populist / nationalist / sovereigntist right are kingmakers for new government
18 year old boy who thinks he is girl planned to shoot up elementary school in Maryland
Biden assault on democracy continues to build as he ramps up dictatorship
One would think that the former Attorney General would have known better
illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic
UNC board committee votes unanimously to end DEI in UNC system


Police in the nation’s capital are not stopping illegal aliens who are driving around without license plates, according to a new report.
Davidaon County student suspended for using correct legal term for those in country illegally
Lawmakers and privacy experts on both sides of the political spectrum are sounding the alarm on a provision in a spy powers reform bill that one senator described as one of the “most terrifying expansions of government surveillance” in history
given to illegals in Mexico before they even get to US: NGOs connected to Mayorkas
committee gets enough valid signatures to force vote on removing Oakland, CA's Soros DA
other pro-terrorist protests in Chicago shout "Death to America" in Farsi


Back to Top