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Gates apologized for his past relationship with Epstein.
Published: Friday, March 20th, 2026 @ 9:15 am
By: Daily Wire
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Chilean congress already in solid conservative hands
Published: Monday, December 15th, 2025 @ 9:25 am
By: John Steed
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"Naked, forced on her knees, with her hands over her head, begging for her life. Begging for her hero, her father. Me, that couldn’t be there."
Published: Wednesday, October 8th, 2025 @ 9:21 am
By: Daily Wire
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As part of STEM East’s Industry in Schools Week, Beaufort County Community College (Beaufort CCC) hosted high school students for two hands-on career exploration events on April 11 and April 16, showcasing career opportunities in both aviation and skilled trades.
Published: Saturday, June 28th, 2025 @ 10:03 am
By: Attila Nemecz
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"Strategic masterstroke by Israel," a retired British military and intelligence official said.
Published: Sunday, December 22nd, 2024 @ 8:58 am
By: Daily Wire
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"The blood is going to be on your hands."
Published: Thursday, March 14th, 2024 @ 7:50 pm
By: Daily Wire
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ATHENS, GA — Following the murder of a Georgia college student at the hands of an illegal immigrant, police issued a statement warning women to avoid jogging within 2,000 miles of an open border, particularly the southern border the U.S. shares with Mexico.
Published: Monday, March 4th, 2024 @ 10:59 am
By: Babylon Bee
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With back-to-back losses following last night's disappointing defeat at the hands of the Buffalo Bills, the Kansas City Chiefs have made a roster move, opting to swap out Taylor Swift for Selena Gomez.
Published: Thursday, February 22nd, 2024 @ 9:55 am
By: Babylon Bee
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What was initially a startling archeological discovery quickly turned to tragedy today, as climate change activists arrived at the site of the newly discovered Ark of the Covenant, glued their hands to it, and were immediately struck down dead.
Published: Saturday, February 10th, 2024 @ 9:47 am
By: Babylon Bee
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With Disney's latest animated film Wish bombing at the box office, the House of Mouse is looking for anything that can be done to correct its box office nosedive this year. Long regarded as an invincible creative force, Disney has all hands on deck to solve the problem.
Published: Sunday, February 4th, 2024 @ 2:59 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Pastor Donald Rogers of Second Baptist Birmingham started today's service by unveiling a new church disclaimer that any lyrics about lifting up your hands should be understood as strictly metaphorical.
Published: Friday, January 26th, 2024 @ 7:42 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Amid charges that Elon Musk's social media app "X" has become a dangerous breeding ground for speech Communists don't like, Apple CEO Tim Cook has elected to pull all Apple advertising from the platform.
Published: Thursday, January 25th, 2024 @ 2:05 am
By: Babylon Bee
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"This disgraceful resolution serves only one purpose: to try to tie Israel's hands and allow Hamas to continue its reign of terror.”
Published: Wednesday, January 3rd, 2024 @ 12:56 am
By: Daily Wire
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Parents are encouraged to check their child's Halloween candy haul every year to keep an eye out for razor blades and granola bars, but they didn't have to worry about the treats they'd get from the White House — until now.
Published: Saturday, December 23rd, 2023 @ 9:44 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Jewel Kilcher is probably the single most talented performer / songwriter, in terms of ballads, in the last 20 years.
Published: Thursday, December 21st, 2023 @ 10:36 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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The tragic demise of three Israeli hostages at the hands of IDF gunmen speaks volumes to both the lethal nature of urban warfare / genocide and the foolishness of counting on government elements to save your life when taken hostage at gun point.
Published: Wednesday, December 20th, 2023 @ 8:26 pm
By: The Correspondent
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As the situation leading up to a vote to determine whether he would remain as Speaker of the House began to look more grim, Kevin McCarthy sought to take matters into his own hands and began frantically running through the corridors of the U.S. Capitol building
Published: Friday, December 1st, 2023 @ 11:34 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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In a desperate bid to stop First Baptist Church from voting on hideous new carpet, local elder Gary McCord took matters into his own hands and pulled the church's fire alarm.
Published: Tuesday, November 28th, 2023 @ 12:57 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Sushi and Japanese steakhouse Benihana offered pop superstar Britney Spears an attractive offer to come work as one of their famed Hibachi chefs after the singer posted a video online this week of her dancing and gyrating with two large steak knives in her hands.
Published: Sunday, November 26th, 2023 @ 9:44 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Former President Barack Obama whitewashed the Islamic terrorist attack that Hamas committed against Israel last month where terrorists murdered 1,400 Israelis, wounded 5,300, and kidnapped more than 240 people.
Published: Sunday, November 19th, 2023 @ 11:29 pm
By: Daily Wire
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As tennis champion Coco Gauff knelt on the court with her eyes closed and hands folded, puzzled ESPN commentators were left to wildly speculate as to what Ms. Gauff could possibly be doing.
Published: Monday, November 13th, 2023 @ 11:11 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Sen. J.D. Vance (R-OH) rejected over the weekend that a push to send humanitarian aid into Gaza as Israel would help to rid the area of the terrorists responsible for committing the October 7 attacks.
Published: Monday, November 13th, 2023 @ 8:12 am
By: Daily Wire
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Sen. Tim Scott (R-SC) doubled down over the weekend on his recent remarks that President Joe Biden had blood on his hands with respect to the terrorist attacks in Israel two weeks ago after he agreed to unfreeze $6 billion in Iranian assets.
Published: Tuesday, November 7th, 2023 @ 4:54 am
By: Daily Wire
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New details have begun to emerge about the barbaric evils that innocent Israeli citizens were forced to experience at the hands of savage Palestinian Islamic terrorists with Hamas during their unprecedented terror attack two weeks ago.
Published: Tuesday, November 7th, 2023 @ 3:48 am
By: Daily Wire
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ATLANTA, GA — Former President Donald Trump has been indicted by Fulton County for looking too stunning and handsome in his mugshot photo.
Published: Thursday, October 26th, 2023 @ 10:55 am
By: Babylon Bee
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After President Biden released $6 billion in frozen oil revenues to Iran, the theocratic despotic Iranian regime released five American prisoners it had detained for years.
Published: Monday, October 9th, 2023 @ 12:14 pm
By: Daily Wire
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President Joe Biden spent part of his overseas trip wringing his hands over the possibility that global temperatures could rise by 1.5°, calling the prospect “more frightening than nuclear war.”
Published: Monday, October 2nd, 2023 @ 6:50 pm
By: Daily Wire
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During a balloon-bedazzled spectacle on the front steps of the White House, unifying and decent President Biden reiterated that the giant, oversized check from Burisma that he held in his hands was right-wing misinformation.
Published: Tuesday, September 19th, 2023 @ 1:08 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Following the death of a young immigrant at the hands of a baguette-wielding police officer, France has entered its sixth day of chaos as rival protesters keep trying to surrender to each other.
Published: Friday, August 18th, 2023 @ 1:27 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Nutrition science students scale up food production to nourish the campus community
Published: Tuesday, June 27th, 2023 @ 12:43 pm
By: ECU News Services
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This summer seventeen agencies will offer practical work experience in public service
Published: Tuesday, June 13th, 2023 @ 8:34 am
By: ENC NOW
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According to sources, the extremely beautiful and perfect Congresswoman AOC has still failed to notice a group of handsome and talented satire writers, even though they are really funny and have written dozens of hilarious headlines about her just to make her laugh.
Published: Friday, June 2nd, 2023 @ 11:27 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Actor-turned-politician Arnold Schwarzenegger took matters into his own hands when after the city did not repair a large pothole in his Los Angeles neighborhood.
Published: Saturday, May 13th, 2023 @ 10:13 am
By: Daily Wire
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Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) sparred with New York City Democratic Mayor Eric Adams over the death of Jordan Neely, a homeless man with an extensive criminal record, at the hands of a former Marine.
Published: Sunday, May 7th, 2023 @ 4:42 am
By: Daily Wire
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In brief remarks today regarding the ongoing debate about biological male athletes identifying as females and competing in women's sports, President Joe Biden made sure to specifically thank former soccer star and controversial activist Megan Rapinoe for supporting inclusivity.
Published: Wednesday, May 3rd, 2023 @ 8:26 am
By: Babylon Bee
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North Carolina State Rep. Tricia Cotham is defecting from the Democratic Party, joining the GOP, and delivering Republicans supermajorities in both chambers of the state legislature.
Published: Monday, May 1st, 2023 @ 7:37 am
By: Daily Wire
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After weeks of speculation, Trump faces 30 different charges related to Stormy Daniels hush money.
Published: Thursday, April 13th, 2023 @ 1:51 am
By: John Locke Foundation
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Media outlets around the country joined hands today to call for a moment of silent remembrance for Audrey Hale, a mass shooter who was misgendered.
Published: Wednesday, April 12th, 2023 @ 12:12 am
By: Babylon Bee
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After being alerted to a possible indictment of former President Trump, law enforcement scrambled to try to find handcuffs big enough to fit his unbelievably massive hands.
Published: Thursday, March 30th, 2023 @ 11:33 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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President Joe Biden issued an executive order Tuesday aimed at keeping firearms out of “dangerous hands” by expanding background checks on gun sales and increasing the use of so-called red flag laws.
Published: Wednesday, March 22nd, 2023 @ 12:44 am
By: Daily Wire
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