China Starting To Worry TikTok Has Made Americans Even Dumber Than They Intended

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Under the cover of Covid, and now in the shadow of the infamous Election Irregularities of that fated 2020 presidential election, with current emerging alleged election fraud in Nevada and Pennsylvania inconveniently slipping into the public discourse, there is proved a colluded ongoing Election Interference in the nomination of the Republican candidate, the likes of which has never occurred in our Constitutional Republic's history, albeit, the question remains: Do you support the plain-sight Election Interference of the Democratic Socialist party, employing its minions in their Propagandistic Media, and their Two Tiered Justice System?

98.82% No, I do not support Election Interference; I am a patriot unto our Constitution.

1.18% Yes, I do support Election Interference; the alternative, Donald Trump, to this mentally diminished president is far worse.

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China Starting To Worry TikTok Has Made Americans Even Dumber Than They Intended

Published: Tuesday, August 30th, 2022 @ 11:57 am
By: Babylon Bee ( More Entries )

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    BEIJING     Sources at the CIA have determined it is in the best interest of the United States that they publicize intercepted recordings of a high-profile meeting among China's top government officers, proving that China is worried TikTok has made Americans even dumber than they intended.

    The editorial team at The Babylon Bee has decided to publish a portion of the meeting below. Reader be warned: the scope of TikTok's stupidifying of the American people may be too disturbing to read.

    BEGIN TRANSCRIPT

    CHINESE SPY #1: Chairman Xi, welcome to the command center for TikTok: Operation Ameridumb.

    XI JINPING: Thanks for having me, I like how you've decorated the walls with giant portraits of me.

    CHINESE SPY #2: You flatter us, sir.

    XI JINPING: So what's all nonsense about TikTok being too powerful?

    CHINESE SPY #1: Unfortunately sir, TikTok has become highly effective at making Americans stupid.

    CHINESE SPY #2: Too effective, sir.

    XI JINPING: That's great news! Those Americans have outwitted us at every turn due to their hard work, deep patriotism, and brilliant minds.

    CHINESE SPY #1: Sir, you don't understand...they're too stupid.

    CHINESE SPY #2: Beyond stupid, sir.

    CHINESE SPY #1: American stupidity is so high because of TikTok, it is spreading to other countries like a virus.

    XI JINPING: Impossible. TikTok is strictly censored here in the mother country. We're safe...right?

    CHINESE SPY #2: Sir, they've forgotten their genders.

    CHINESE SPY #1: And they think Monopoly money is real.

    CHINESE SPY #2: They seek wisdom from celebrities.

    CHINESE SPY #1: Chairman, they gave their nuclear codes to a rutabaga.

    XI JINPING: Great Mao's Ghost, what have we done? Can we stop it?

    CHINESE SPY #1: It's too late. Our people are already infected, becoming morons.

    XI JINPING: How so?

    CHINESE SPY #2: We let them watch movies from the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

    XI JINPING: The Chinese censored versions, right?

    CHINESE SPY #2: ...

    XI JINPING: The Chinese censored versions, RIGHT?

    CHINESE SPY #1 ...no sir, the American versions.

    XI JINPING: God help us all.

    END TRANSCRIPT

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