Jen Psaki Excited To Start Her First Day of The Same Job | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON, D.C.     Jen Psaki has started her first day at a completely new job where she will be doing the exact same thing she's always done by acting as a mouthpiece for the Biden Administration. Psaki says she's excited to try something new while also changing nothing at all.

    "I just have butterflies in my stomach. It's all so new and different here," said Jen Psaki walking into the MSNBC offices. "I feel like I don't know what to say, I guess I'll just do what I always do and spin the news to run cover for Democrats. That's what I was hired for, right?"

    According to sources, all of Jen Psaki's onboarding training designated for new hires was waived for her. MSNBC staff agreed there was nothing left that they had to show her, as she had already proven herself skilled at blandly delivering Democrat talking points from a notebook as White House Press Secretary.

    Jen said that she was pleased she didn't even have to change out her badge. She just scanned her same badge from when she was White House Press secretary and walked right in and got right to work. "I will have to get used to mindlessly reading from a teleprompter instead of mindlessly reading from a 3-ring binder, but I am excited that I don't have to worry about my hair getting sniffed constantly!" said Psaki.

    At publishing time, Jen grew a little nervous speaking from behind the newsdesk for the first time, but then she took a deep breath and just imagined that the newsdesk was a podium instead.

poll#128

Where do you stand on the wanton censorship by Big Tech Platforms, while retaining their Section 230 carveout indemnifying them for Slander /Defamation lawsuits and Copyright infringements?

  Big Tech Platforms have the right to Censor all speech providing they voluntarily relinquish their Section 230 Carveout.

  Big Tech Platforms DO NOT have the right to Censor any speech, while retaining multiple indemnifications by virtue of the Section 230 Carveout.

  I know nothing of this 230 talk, but "I do love me some social media".

476 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#125

Since only about 20% of the News Media has any shred of Journalistic Integrity remaining: How does our Constitutional Republic continue without a "Free Press"?

  Demand real information, using real sources, backed up by facts.

  Promote real journalist entities only, and admonish those that prostitute their profession.

  We Democratic Socialists are doing just fine, thank-you, by promoting lies while having very little real knowledge about so much.

260 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#132

Considering that Joe Biden is considered by so many to be the Imposter President: Is he actually knowledgeable enough, wise enough, patriotic enough to be this Constitutional Republic's president at this difficult point in these tumultuous times?

  Yes, Mr. Biden is thoughtful and kind, and just so different from the "Orange Man".

  No, this representation of "president" is either too corrupt, too stupid, or both to be a real president.

  I just want the fun guy, who knew how to make stuff work back.

670 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?