Education Secretary To Deliver First-Annual 'State Of The Groomers' Speech | Eastern NC Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON, D.C.     The U.S. Secretary of Education Miguel Cardona will be delivering America's first-annual "State of the Groomers" speech this evening, sources say.

    "I will be speaking tonight from the hallowed halls of the Department of Education to reassure Americans that the state of our grooming is strong," said Cardona. "Public School teachers have dedicated their lives to grooming children for years, and tonight we must make them feel seen, supported, and protected."

    Cardona's team confirmed he plans to outline recent advances in child grooming in grades K-12, as well as several policy proposals to protect the practice of state-sanctioned grooming for years to come.

    "We will never shy away from our sacred duty to indoctrinate kids with our perverse sexual politics and push them into a Big Pharma sales pipeline that will make them medical patients for the rest of their lives," Cardona continued. "If that's not the purpose of education, what is?"

    At publishing time, the speech had been delayed as none of Cardona's recently graduated speechwriters knew how to read or write.

poll#166

With the Midterm Elections less than one week away: What do you consider the top issues that you will be voting on to be corrected by your better representation?

  Education

  Crime

  Big Government getting Bigger

  Biden /Democrat controlled Spike in Energy Cost

  Inflation created by Legislation of Majority in Power

  Gender Reassignment

  Corrupted Bureaucratic /Service (DOJ, FBI, etc.) Institutions

  Abortion

  Discredited Legacy Media

  Ending the Corruption of Dishonest Politicians

  Corruptive Influence of Social Media

  Wide Open Southern Border

439 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?