DOJ Finds No Evidence Of Bribery In Photo Of Biden Holding Sign Reading ‘Will Trade Political Favors 4 Cash’ | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    WASHINGTON, D.C.     The Department of Justice announced they have found zero evidence of bribery in a photograph of Hunter Biden carrying a bag of cash next to President Biden holding a sign that reads, "Will Trade Political Favors 4 Cash."

    "Welp, no trace of bribery here," said Attorney General Merrick Garland, ripping up the photo. "Total nothing-burger."

    The Department of Justice promised to review the photograph for any possible evidence of bribery after a whistle-blower made the image public. "We really looked it over, but I just can't find anything suspicious about Biden holding a sign that offers to accept bribes," said FBI Agent Ron Daniels. "There is simply nothing incriminating about Hunter standing next to him with a giant bag of cash. I don't know what people expect us to do with this."

    The White House assured the American public that the judiciary remained politically neutral, and would show no bias towards the President's son. "Attorney General Garland met up with Hunter for a nice steak dinner right after Hunter's plea deal to reiterate the DOJ's impartiality," said Press Secretary Karine Jeanne-Pierre. "While several sources reported that Hunter offered Mr. Garland some crack cocaine as a thank-you, we have been assured by the DOJ that no crime was committed at the dinner. With that said, all questions, as always, can be referred to someone else."

    At publishing time, the IRS had reviewed Hunter's deduction of prostitute payments from his taxes, and determined there was "no sign of any tax fraud whatsoever."

poll#175

Understanding that this fragile Republic of the self-governed is in a precarious space in our nation's vast history: What is your honor bound patriotic duty in helping to sustain the continuance of these United States of America?

  I will depend on my Democratic Socialist politicians to continue to march hard toward the Left to provide Diversity, Equity and Inclusion for all who think and do as they are told.

  I will defend the Constitution of the United States of America, and support all elected leaders who pledge to protect and insure the continued sovereignty of this Representative Republic.

  I am very concerned about maintaining my current life style without working. I was told that as long as I vote Democrat, I had nothing to worry about ... but now I worry.

296 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#164

It has been far too many years since the Woke theology interlaced its canons within the fabric of the Indoctrination Realm, so it is nigh time to ask: Does this Representative Republic continue, as a functioning society of a self-governed people, by contending with the unusual, self absorbed dictates of the Woke, and their vast array of Victimhood scenarios?

  Yes, the Religion of Woke must continue; there are so many groups of underprivileged, underserved, a direct result of unrelenting Inequity; they deserve everything.

  No; the Woke fools must be toppled from their self-anointed pedestal; a functioning society of a good Constitutional people cannot withstand this level of "existential" favoritism as it exists now.

  I just observe; with this thoughtful observation: What will happen "when the Vikings are breeching our walls;" how do the Woke react?

845 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?

poll#183

Considering that the 2024 Presidential Election has fully begun, and the Biden Administration has consequently fully weaponized the Biden DOJ /FBI to attack all political opponents under the penalty of felonious judgement for many of the same alleged crimes, or worse, committed by Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden himself: Are you comfortable with this level of overt corruption within the Executive Branch?

  Yes; if Democratic Socialists are to complete the remaking of this "Democracy," the End will Always Justify the Means.

  No; in a Constitutional Republic, the Rule of Law is paramount, which means the law MUST be administered evenly

  Who cares; I am just so ambivalent to all this grown-up stuff.

311 total vote(s)     What's your Opinion?