9 Things Every Good American Patriot Should Stock Up On Before WWIII Starts | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    As everyone can clearly see, the end of the world is right around the corner. As you take inventory of your life and possessions, you may want to start thinking about what you'll need when the inevitable downfall of American civilization arrives.

    Thankfully, The Babylon Bee is here to provide a helpful list of everything a freedom-loving American should start hoarding before war engulfs the globe.

  1. Trump NFTs: There's a decent chance these will end up being treated as currency in the civilization to come.
  2. Axis & Allies Anniversary Edition: You're going to have a lot of time to play games in your underground bunker.
  3. Pre-censorship Dr. Seuss books: Remembering the way things once were will help you carry on.
  4. Copies of all your political rants from social media so you can tell everyone "I told you so!": Important.
  5. The Art of the Deal: It's important to save the foundational works of Western civilization so we can rebuild society from the ashes.
  6. Enough ammo to fend off billions of flesh-eating mutants: Just put it on your credit card.
  7. Pogs: All of the other pogs in the world will be destroyed - just think of the fortune you'll make having the only ones.
  8. COVID masks: To burn for warmth.
  9. Donald Trump's DNA: President Clone Trump will help us rebuild the biggest, most beautiful society anyone has ever seen, all protected by a big, beautiful Trump clone army.

    Follow the list above, start gathering what you need, seal yourself up in your shelter, and you'll be totally fine!
Go Back

Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published)
Enter Your Comment ( no code or urls allowed, text only please )

FBI Races Past Protesters Screaming ‘Kill The Jews’ To Arrest Woman Praying Silently Outside Abortion Clinic Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Billions Convert To Faith In God After Astros Defeated In Playoffs


Latest Op-Ed & Politics

“Squad” member Rep. Ayanna Pressley (D-MA) accused Walgreens of racism after the company closed a pharmacy in her district.
Governor Cooper and NCDHHS Secretary Kody Kinsley Joined Doctors, Advocates and New Beneficiaries at Enrollment Fair in Charlotte
Multiple people were shot and at least one was killed when gunfire erupted at a parade celebrating the Kansas City Chiefs’ Super Bowl win this week.
Guilford County is considering an additional 1% Prepared Food and Beverage Tax, with the support of Greensboro Mayor Nancy Vaughan.
“Sound of Freedom” beat out Taylor Swift’s “The Eras Tour” movie to finish in the top ten of 2023 box office tallies domestically.
A local marriage is reportedly on the rocks after a woman expressed a desire to go on more dates with her husband, apparently forgetting he just took her to Costco yesterday.
follows Canadian province of Alberta adoptning Alberta Sovereignty Act last year


Charles Fain Lehman, fellow at the Manhattan Institute and contributing editor to City Journal, discusses his report, “Who Pays For Reparations? The Immigration Challenge in the Reparations Debate.”
Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis was in a personal relationship with special prosecutor Nathan Wade before she hired him in late 2021 for the 2020 election interference case against former President Donald Trump, a witness testified on Thursday.
Finding a good, Christian girl has never been harder. That's why The Babylon Bee is here to help out by offering you this tried and tested list of the absolute best places to look.
The U.S. Supreme Court ruled 5-4 on Monday that the Biden administration may cut through or tear down razor wire that the state of Texas has placed along the U.S.-Mexico border as it seeks to stop foreign nationals from illegally crossing into the U.S.
A prominent black radio show personality reportedly feels “burned” over his past support of Vice President Kamala Harris.
A three-judge panel of the North Carolina Court of Appeals heard arguments Tuesday in a suit brought by parents claiming that a Charlotte-area private school went woke and then expelled students of parents who disagreed.
Daily Wire Editor Emeritus Ben Shapiro slammed President Joe Biden’s response to a special counsel report showing that he had memory issues during an appearance on the Megyn Kelly show on Friday where they also discussed his new docu-series, “The Divided States of Biden.”


Authorities announced they had no choice but to put down Stephen Colbert after the late-night host tragically went mad from rabies last week.
House impeachment articles filed against Homeland Security Secretary Alejandro Mayorkas over his handling of the border crisis may be in jeopardy as at least one Republican says that he will oppose them, and others have yet to come to a decision.
President Joe Biden’s son, Hunter Biden, allegedly took photographs with his phone of “apparent” cocaine, crack cocaine, and other drug paraphernalia, according to court documents filed by Biden’s Department of Justice.
On Wednesday, state lawmakers released newly drawn maps for congressional districts and state House and Senate districts.
“The Chosen” dropped a fiery new trailer on Thursday that gives fans a sneak peek at what to expect in the upcoming episodes in Season 4, which will be shown in theaters.
What began as a pleasant seminar at Lakewood Church devolved into an awkward situation today, as Senior Pastor Joel Osteen was stumped by one attendee who asked him to name three books from the Bible.
A federally funded effort to make biology classes 'inclusive' for transgender students blasts the belief that there are two genders as 'inaccurate'
How you vote will determine how much your taxes will go up


Back to Top