Man Longs For Good Old Days When He Could Go Online Without Seeing Gay Capitol Sex Tape

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Under the cover of Covid, and now in the shadow of the infamous Election Irregularities of that fated 2020 presidential election, with current emerging alleged election fraud in Nevada and Pennsylvania inconveniently slipping into the public discourse, there is proved a colluded ongoing Election Interference in the nomination of the Republican candidate, the likes of which has never occurred in our Constitutional Republic's history, albeit, the question remains: Do you support the plain-sight Election Interference of the Democratic Socialist party, employing its minions in their Propagandistic Media, and their Two Tiered Justice System?

98.86% No, I do not support Election Interference; I am a patriot unto our Constitution.

1.14% Yes, I do support Election Interference; the alternative, Donald Trump, to this mentally diminished president is far worse.

0% "What, me worry" if elections are rigged?

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Man Longs For Good Old Days When He Could Go Online Without Seeing Gay Capitol Sex Tape

Published: Thursday, February 29th, 2024 @ 11:27 pm
By: Babylon Bee ( More Entries )

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on Eastern NC NOW with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    ROANOKE, VA     Local man Kamal Ram found himself this morning pining for the good old days when a guy could log onto the internet without seeing gay Capitol sex tapes.

    "Ah, those were the days," said Ram wistfully. "We lived in simpler times, last Thursday."

    According to sources, Ram had enjoyed a morning cup of coffee and had a nice devotional time before innocently opening his laptop to watch some basketball highlights. "Oh, come on!" said Ram as his eyes were immediately assaulted with a gay Capitol sex tape. "I didn't sign up for this! I just wanted to watch some basketball! Can we just not do this, America? Okay? Can we please allow everyone to check their phones without seeing dudes getting weird in the Capitol?"

    Nauseated and longing for blindness, Ram was left yearning for the days of yore. "We didn't know how good we had it," sighed Ram. "We just went online, never thinking we were about to be shown gay sex tapes filmed inside the nation's Capitol. Those were the days, man."

    At publishing time, ophthalmology offices across the nation had been overwhelmed by patients who had poured copious amounts of bleach on their eyeballs.

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