Facing Low Approval, Biden Promises To Start Pretending To Care About The Border | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on Eastern NC NOW with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    BROWNSVILLE, TX     With his approval hovering near record lows, President Biden made a trip to the Southern Border today and promised to begin pretending to care about it.

    "Listen folks, here's the deal. I don't care about the border," said the President to a Border Patrol horse he mistook for an agent. "But as I stand here today, I vow to begin pretending to care. I will do this until my approval numbers go up a few points. As long as the border continues to stay wide open and let millions of people in, by golly, I will really feign concern."

    Biden then began to tell a moving story about how his son once died while trying to cross the border.

    "The nation is breathing a sigh of relief this afternoon, knowing that Biden really looks like he almost cares," said CNN anchor Jake Tapper. "Just look at his furrowed brow and concerned-looking eyes. No one can simulate sympathy like President Biden. Wow, what a great guy."

    At publishing time, Biden's realistic-looking concern was interrupted by him being trampled over by a crowd of 5,000 border-crossers from Somalia.
Go Back

Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published)
Enter Your Comment ( no code or urls allowed, text only please )

In Massive Strategic Blow To Satan's Battle Plans, Family Makes It To Church Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics 'I Don't Need Church, I Study The Bible For Myself,' Says Man Who Has Clearly Never Studied The Bible For Himself


Latest Op-Ed & Politics

Police in the nation’s capital are not stopping illegal aliens who are driving around without license plates, according to a new report.
Davidaon County student suspended for using correct legal term for those in country illegally
Lawmakers and privacy experts on both sides of the political spectrum are sounding the alarm on a provision in a spy powers reform bill that one senator described as one of the “most terrifying expansions of government surveillance” in history
given to illegals in Mexico before they even get to US: NGOs connected to Mayorkas
committee gets enough valid signatures to force vote on removing Oakland, CA's Soros DA
other pro-terrorist protests in Chicago shout "Death to America" in Farsi


Only two of the so-called “three Johns” will be competing to replace Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-KY) as leader of the Senate GOP.
House Judiciary Chair Jim Jordan (R-OH) is looking into whether GoFundMe and Eventbrite cooperated with federal law enforcement during their investigation into the financial transactions of supporters of former President Donald Trump.
Turkish diplomatic sources say he did
Popularity of government leader crashes, even among his own party members.
Wisconsin voters ban private money, nonprofits from the election process after 2020 ‘Zuckerbucks’ controversy; spotlight now on 22 states that still allow it.
6 month old baby fighting for life after mother killed; policewoman finally arrives, shoots knifeman


Far-left Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) was mocked online late on Monday after video of her yelling at pro-Palestinian activists went viral.
Daily Wire Editor Emeritus Ben Shapiro, along with hosts Matt Walsh, Andrew Klavan, and company co-founder Jeremy Boreing discussed the state of the 2024 presidential election before President Joe Biden gave his State of the Union address on Thursday.
Lots of elements that have to be dug up with heavy fossil fuel vehicles
Yet again we see the truth in the ole saying, once the camel gets his head under the test ain't no tellin what he will do next
joins West Virginia and Montana in ending Renewable Portfolio standards
good Washington Examiner analysis, but where is RNC on pushing back on this issue?


Back to Top