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Local owner of The Krusty Krab Eugene Krabs is in hot water after newly unsealed documents revealed he visited Weenie Hut Jr's over 50 times over the last 10 years.
Published: Wednesday, August 7th, 2024 @ 6:52 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Robert Hathaway Rhodes (Bobby), aged 89, a life-long resident of Washington, N.C., passed peacefully surrounded by family on Wednesday, February 7, 2024.
Published: Monday, February 12th, 2024 @ 9:53 am
By: Announcements
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“Shame on those pretending the massacre didn’t happen."
Published: Sunday, February 4th, 2024 @ 2:25 am
By: Daily Wire
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Local college student Brenda Thurgood was overheard whispering, "I'm on the right side of history" while ogling posters of Stalin, Hitler, and Osama Bin Laden plastered on her dorm room wall.
Published: Thursday, January 25th, 2024 @ 12:46 am
By: Babylon Bee
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In an effort to repair the damage done to its image that resulted in it being relegated to "gay beer," beverage titan Bud Light has entered into a partnership with a sports organization where sweaty men in underwear hug and wrestle each other for extended periods of time.
Published: Sunday, December 17th, 2023 @ 2:29 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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A.I.-generated supermodels are turning heads and garnering millions of followers with their slim, lithe, fake bodies showing off fake bikinis and elegant, non-existent gowns.
Published: Tuesday, October 3rd, 2023 @ 3:06 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Senators are speaking out on the decision to relax the chamber’s dress code that some are calling “The Fetterman rule,” a nod to Sen. John Fetterman (D-PA) with his penchant for hoodies and gym shorts.
Published: Saturday, September 30th, 2023 @ 9:16 am
By: Daily Wire
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A top California plastic surgeon estimates that over the years President Biden has spent the equivalent of $100,000 in current dollars on plastic surgery, including a face and eyebrow lift.
Published: Sunday, September 24th, 2023 @ 10:14 pm
By: Daily Wire
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After catching his teenage son looking at pornography, local father Daniel Gouge sat his son down for a heart-to-heart talk before meting out justice by giving him a copy of the latest swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated, which features Martha Stewart on the cover.
Published: Tuesday, June 13th, 2023 @ 5:59 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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As part of a continued push to project a more inclusive, body-positive message, this year's edition of the iconic Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue will feature a walrus wearing a bikini. Decision-makers at the publication are certain the public will love the choice.
Published: Saturday, May 6th, 2023 @ 1:22 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Raquel Welch, an actress who was considered one of the most attractive women to ever star in the film industry, passed away Wednesday. She was 82 years old.
Published: Saturday, February 18th, 2023 @ 9:35 am
By: Daily Wire
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A notorious French serial killer known as “The Serpent” or the “Bikini Killer” has been released from prison in Nepal due to his age.
Published: Tuesday, January 3rd, 2023 @ 11:57 am
By: Daily Wire
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"There are men that have bigger breasts than I do right now but they're able to be topless? Why can't I be topless?"
Published: Saturday, December 24th, 2022 @ 4:54 am
By: Daily Wire
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Safety officials have confirmed that the rickety-looking, collapsible roller coaster at your local town carnival, which is currently being operated by a toothless meth addict, is probably fine.
Published: Thursday, July 21st, 2022 @ 11:28 am
By: Babylon Bee
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"Many of you likely use and promote the #MeToo movement—yet hundreds of you are sending me unsolicited sexual images and videos."
Published: Monday, April 4th, 2022 @ 8:22 am
By: Daily Wire
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Former Disney actress Bella Thorne, who recently directed a pornographic film, rebuffed criticism that she’s “controversial” and denounced what she categorized as sexist attacks, according to recent interview with The Daily Beast, titled, “Bella Thorne Is Tired of Being Slut-Shamed.”
Published: Friday, March 25th, 2022 @ 7:22 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Wake up America
Published: Thursday, October 28th, 2021 @ 11:14 am
By: Countrygirl1411
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On July 16, 1945, the United States detonated the world’s first nuclear device in Alamogordo, New Mexico.
Published: Tuesday, August 3rd, 2021 @ 5:50 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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Just an attempt at humor with a play on "What's in your wallet?"
Published: Thursday, May 12th, 2016 @ 12:25 pm
By: Ted McDonald
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He has written on everything from the death penalty to bikini waxing, from NASCAR racing to the stealth bomber, for such newspapers as the New York Times, the Washington Post, the Philadelphia Inquirer, and the Los Angeles Times and such magazines as Backpacker, Fortune, and ESPN.
Published: Saturday, September 12th, 2015 @ 3:52 am
By: Gene Scarborough
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Environmental pressure groups, activist scientists, and the legacy media are predictably upset by the movement of a bill through the N.C. General Assembly that requires state policies dependent on sea level forecasts to be based on historical trends, rather than speculative computer projections.
Published: Sunday, June 17th, 2012 @ 4:36 pm
By: John Locke Foundation
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More Holy Humor, or Part II from our friend Gene.
Published: Wednesday, April 11th, 2012 @ 6:47 pm
By: Gene Scarborough
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