Everything's more expensive in this economy, including toilet paper! If you're looking to save some money on pricey bathroom tissue, here are a few equally viable alternatives for wiping your posterior.
Published: Wednesday, December 6th, 2023 @ 6:51 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Liberal man Jonathan Seymour passed away, dying on the toilet as he awaited instructions from the Center for Disease Control on how to wipe his own butt.
Published: Sunday, October 29th, 2023 @ 12:03 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Plumbing experts have determined that screaming, "No!! No, dear heavens, no!!!" is the most effective method of addressing an overflowing toilet.
Published: Monday, October 23rd, 2023 @ 3:51 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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A local man found himself in a jam when his toilet failed to flush yesterday morning. Rather than call a professional plumber to fix the issue, the man called upon the entire backlog of plumbing knowledge he has accumulated during his life: jiggling the toilet handle.
Published: Tuesday, May 30th, 2023 @ 12:00 am
By: Babylon Bee
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After collecting data from thousands of toilets across the country, dog scientists have definitively determined that toilet water contains essential nutrients not found in a water bowl.
Published: Tuesday, September 13th, 2022 @ 9:43 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Amber Heard has landed a major endorsement deal with Proctor & Gamble to promote Charmin brand toilet paper products.
Published: Wednesday, June 8th, 2022 @ 1:19 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The year ended with a record-breaking $3.1 trillion deficit and, as usual, the U.S. government managed to blow tens of billions on a myriad of wasteful projects that should provoke outrage among tax-paying Americans.
Published: Saturday, January 23rd, 2021 @ 4:16 am
By: Judicial Watch
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Calm down people!
Published: Friday, April 10th, 2020 @ 1:34 am
By: LifeZette
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In a domain in which the proposed "therapies" are so drastic, it is not too much to ask for a solid, evidence-based statement of who is being treated, for what, and why, before writing a prescription or passing a law.
Published: Sunday, April 24th, 2016 @ 10:33 pm
By: Civitas Insitute
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