If you are what you eat, maybe you are what your group thinks. | Eastern North Carolina Now

    Recently I saw on TV where our old Liberal friends in New York are on a tear about excess salt in our food. It is not enough that they raise awareness to the problem; they want to pass laws that require the restaurants to include warning labels on every meal that is above the appropriate level of sodium.

    I have for years held onto the theory that the most important thing affecting your beliefs and actions in a society is your peer group. Since people naturally gravitate toward people of like mind and beliefs, there is reinforcement in groups.

    This is true throughout my life and is a simple basis for making decisions. If you think you have the answer to any question, take a moment to look around at your group. Do they all believe in the same answer? If so, you should step back and review other alternatives. You may in fact have the correct answer but is it based on a review of the facts or just your group's consensus of opinion.

    The whole group cohesion and team building principle is getting everyone thinking with the same goals. That in and of itself is not a problem. The problem occurs when the train gets off the track and begins to head in an uncontrolled headlong rush based on sheer momentum and the group blindly follows the engine.

    One of my overriding principles in raising my kids was to control their peer group. Young adults can get in a lot of trouble if they associate with the wrong group. It irritated my son to no end when I asked him what his buddies father did for a living and where they lived. I made it a point to try to meet the parents of my kid's friends. I did not do this out of a sense of class judgement, but out of a parents concern for them being mixed up with the wrong crowd.

    I will admit that I made some choices about friends that were incorrect and later found out that the kid turned out to be okay. One of my son's friends was from a highly dysfunctional family; he was a troublemaker in rebellion against the world and his family. I discouraged my son from spending much time with his buddy. It was not a matter of being a snob or judgmental about how others live their life. I was raising my son to be a man and not trying to correct the social fabric of society. Many years later, my son found out that his friend had overcome his family problems and had become a very productive well-adjusted young man.

    Was it harsh for me to try to control their peer group? Who cares, I was trying to raise responsible adults and not solve the nuances of human relations or some other family's problems.

    I believe that most of our problems today are based on a society that is afraid to make hard choices about right and wrong based on offending someone. I do not go out of my way to offend people,it is probably my natural personality. But I also do not try to impose my beliefs on others. I believe in live and let live as long as your rights do not infringe on mine.

    That does not mean that I am not wary of certain groups. Our history is long and indicative of group-think that has gotten out of control. As the group thinks, so do the individuals within it. That is why we should examine the agenda of any group or organization. First, we should try to determine the group agenda then we evaluate the members of the group with the agenda in mind. That does not mean that each individual subscribes completely with group-think. However, it does mean that they are in general agreement with the group's goals and thought process, so it is not a bunch of individuals but a gaggle of conformist meandering behind the leader.

    I developed a habit after many years in sales of trying to find out about my potential customers. Years ago, that involved taking them and wife or husband out to dinner to get to know them on a personal basis. Later, it became very easy to do research with social media. The purpose was not to make judgement on their lifestyle and beliefs, but to try to get an understanding of their approach to life. It made for an easier business relationship if you knew what made people tick. For the record, my career in sales was not a high-pressure selling process. I sold industrial product and we sold based on relationship and product performance. Most customers were repeat customers and my job was to apply my products and services to solve their problems.

    I could not sell Ice to Eskimos based on some manipulative sales technique or trick bait and switch. Fortunately, your company's reputation and then eventually yours will precede you before you ever make the first presentation or project quote.

    I have posted before on the difference between Stereotyping and Profiling. It has become a repeated theme in my thoughts as I see the current events unfold around us. People who blindly follow an ideology are more dangerous in my mind than those who just "don't give a crap". Profiling vs Stereotyping

    I have several acquaintances and a few relatives who bombard me in emails and on Facebook with Memes and quirky editorial pictures which reduce the sum total of any subject to a single image. I get them from both sides of the political isle and both sides of the humor universe. I often enjoy them and occasionally forward them on but only if I think it is unique. That is probably what facebook is best at: shallow pronouncments without the need for thought. Twitter may be the next best. Who can make a point in 140 characters? I offer a word of caution here: AVOID ENGAGING PEOPLE WHO TALK IN CLICHES AND MEMES 100% OF THE TIME. Most likely they have not taken the time to investigate their beliefs and are following their bias based groupthink.

    I have some stamps for those occasions, which can save you time by responding in kind without fear of a reasoned discussion ever-taking place. All Stamps All the time

    One of the things I learned from Zig Ziglar, the motivational speaker, is that you should avoid negative people. His phrase was do not be a SNIOP; Susceptible to the Negative Influence of Other People.

    My favorite quote from the first Men in Black illustrates my point:

    "Edwards: Why the big secret? People are smart. They can handle it.

    Kay: A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you'll know tomorrow."

    People in groups can be both dangerous and beneficial; if you do not think that groups can be oblivious to reality, just try to explain which is a better team to a Tar Heel or Blue Devil.

    "HOW BOUT THEM DOGS"!