12 Conservative Celebs Tell Us Their New Year's Resolutions | Eastern NC Now

We asked twelve conservative celebrities what their New Year's resolutions are. Several of them asked us how we got into their homes in the first place, but all of them gave us a thoughtful answer as we were being escorted out by security. Here's what they said:

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    We asked twelve conservative celebrities what their New Year's resolutions are. Several of them asked us how we got into their homes in the first place, but all of them gave us a thoughtful answer as we were being escorted out by security. Here's what they said:

  1. Ben Shapiro - Experience a human emotion for the first time.
  2. Jordan Peterson - Eat fewer fruits and vegetables.
  3. Candace Owens - Totally OWN 8 times as many socialists as she did in 2022.
  4. Matt Walsh - Find someone who can explain to him what a woman is.
  5. Steven Crowder - Find someone who can change his mind.
  6. Dennis Prager - Kick his bad habit of smoking 2 cigars a day, and smoke 3 cigars a day instead.
  7. Rush Limbaugh - Convince God to send him back down for at least the rest of the Biden years. Please, Lord...
  8. Sean Hannity - Touch the hem of Trump's garment.
  9. Mitt Romney - Oh, wait, sorry - this list was for conservatives.
  10. Elon Musk - Cut back to only fathering 17 new children this year.
  11. Tucker Carlson - Learn a new expression.
  12. The Babylon Bee - Come up with a third joke.

    Inspiring! What are your New Year's resolutions? Let us know in the comments!
Go Back


Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published )
Enter Your Comment ( text only please )




Chaos Erupts As Twitter Introduces New 'Top 8 Friends' Feature Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Airports Forced To Hire Extra Security To Guard Thousands Of Stranded Bags From Sam Brinton


HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

illegal alien "asylum seeker" migrants are a crime wave on both sides of the Atlantic
she was actually 86, and says she did not vote in the 51 elections records show
"We are leveraging counterterrorism tools and global partnerships to deter this threat before it metastasizes," an official shared.
The impressions of our youth are indelibly branded in our hearts and minds. As I think of June 6, 1944 (D Day) it always seems that it was my war. I was nine years old.

HbAD1

Not giving our kids their own devices was one of the best parenting decisions my husband and I made.
far left group denounced conservatives as nazis but they were funding REAL nazis
How federal policies influenced family formation and the mid-20th century baby boom — and could do so again.
many sheriffs also refusing to enforce it, as lawsuits against state proliferate

HbAD2

days after migrant bus driver who could not speak English killed 5 and injured 44 in VA
want illegal aliens who have committed crimes in America to stay

HbAD3


HbAD4

 
 
Back to Top