Is It Valentine’s Day? Know The Signs | Eastern North Carolina Now

You have this gnawing feeling you forgot something. Your wife seems mad at you. Oh no! Is it Valentine's Day?

ENCNow
    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    You have this gnawing feeling you forgot something. Your wife seems mad at you. Oh no! Is it Valentine's Day?

    Don't forget this time. Keep an eye out for these telltale signs that the big day has arrived.

  1. The calendar says February 14: Suspicious, especially if yesterday was also February 13.
  2. Your phone alerts you and says "Today is Valentine's Day": Another tantalizing clue.
  3. Your wife keeps asking what you have planned tonight for some reason: Do not say "I was hoping to hone my swing at the driving range after work...why?"
  4. You're sitting in front of a plate of heart-shaped pancakes and your wife is on the other side of the table quietly crying: Act fast - tell her she won't believe the HUGE surprise you definitely have planned for tonight.
  5. You spent hours last night helping the kids prepare Valentine's Day cards and treats for their classmates: Why am I wading through glitter this morning? Oh no!
  6. You just received a valentine: This has to mean something.
  7. The snooty French Maître D' scoffs audibly when you request a reservation for tonight: "Monsieur, today has been booked since November, héhéhé - sacré bleu!"
  8. All the men in your office said they have to leave at 4:45 PM to "pick up something on the way home": Prepare to join swarms of desperate-looking men in the picked-over greeting card aisle.
  9. You're already a month behind in your "Read The Bible In A Year" plan: Add a note to Genesis 37 so you're reminded next year.
  10. You've reached the tenth item on this list and suddenly have a sinking feeling in your gut: If this is you, stop reading this list and sprint to the gas station for a dozen roses RIGHT NOW!

    If you're reading this list, it's probably too late for you. It's ok, there's always next year!
Go Back


Leave a Guest Comment

Your Name or Alias
Your Email Address ( your email address will not be published)
Enter Your Comment ( no code or urls allowed, text only please )



Comment

( February 23rd, 2023 @ 12:01 pm )
 
To the beaufortcountynow.com admin, your posts are always thought-provoking and inspiring.



Pete Buttigieg Celebrates 24 Hours Without A Train Derailment Babylon Bee, Editorials, Op-Ed & Politics Man Just Doesn't Understand Why God Who Is Infinitely Wiser Than He Would Have Different Opinion From Him Sometimes


HbAD0

Latest Op-Ed & Politics

weaponized political FBI needs major reform or replacement
2019, 40 Democrats signed a letter saying they condemned the Nazi Azov Battalion in Ukraine
Voters in Arizona will have the opportunity to enact broad border security measures in November as the state faces a flood of illegal immigration after the Republican-led state legislature passed a resolution that will put the measures on the general election ballot.
51 ex-spies lies to the American people threw the 2020 election
The former White House physician for Presidents Barack Obama and Donald Trump says that a new report this week about how President Joe Biden is struggling to function behind closed doors represents a serious threat to the U.S.
The Tikva Forum for Families of Hostages, an Israeli group created to represent the families of those taken during Hamas’ October 7 terrorist attack, urged President Joe Biden to stop interfering with Israel’s campaign to destroy the terrorist group.
how the Democrats set up the January 6 riot at the Capitol

HbAD1

this is why the left is now attacking Supreme Court justices
Addiction is not just a physical issue, it is also deeply spiritual
told to let all single males just walk in excpet for 6 countries
After saying the six-foot social distancing guideline during the COVID-19 pandemic “sort of just appeared,” Dr. Anthony Fauci on Monday testified that his statement had been “distorted” and that it “actually” came from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC).
Accepting the unacceptable makes the unacceptable acceptable
combined traditional conservatives and populist conservatives win majority for first time
The state Supreme Court has agreed to hear one of two pending cases involving North Carolina bar owners challenging Gov. Roy Cooper's COVID-related shutdowns in 2020.

HbAD2

The Biden administration canceled over 350,000 asylum cases, allowing migrants to stay in the United States indefinitely in a move that experts called “mass amnesty.”
Former White House medical advisor Anthony Fauci changed his view of COVID vaccines from 2021 to 2024, clips show.
UK votes for parliament on July 4th, and EU voting for its parliament now
globalist PM Tusk coddles illegal aliens as soldier loses life defending border
inflated numbers do not tell the true story
Three knife attacks in a week, two by illegal aliens and one by ANTIFA, one killed

HbAD3

 
Back to Top