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Results found for "lizard"


The American public at large has noticed an eerie calm in recent days, leading everyone to believe the slow news week must be a clear indication the reptile overlords who rule the globe must be planning something big.
The American public at large has noticed an eerie calm in recent days, leading everyone to believe the slow news week must be a clear indication the reptile overlords who rule the globe must be planning something big.
 
A new survey of single men has found that the number one qualification they look for in a wife is "someone who will shout at and fight off the invisible lizard people on the plane who aren't real," sources confirmed Monday.
A new survey of single men has found that the number one qualification they look for in a wife is "someone who will shout at and fight off the invisible lizard people on the plane who aren't real," sources confirmed Monday.
 
A local lizard man spoke with reporters to provide a detailed account of a shameful incident of outright harassment he suffered on an airplane while trying to travel from Dallas to Orlando, Florida.
A local lizard man spoke with reporters to provide a detailed account of a shameful incident of outright harassment he suffered on an airplane while trying to travel from Dallas to Orlando, Florida.
 
Politicians in Washington are growing increasingly nervous, as the CDC has announced they have discovered the first case of Lizardpox on American shores.
Published: Sunday, June 26th, 2022 @ 12:26 pm By: Babylon Bee
Politicians in Washington are growing increasingly nervous, as the CDC has announced they have discovered the first case of Lizardpox on American shores.
 
Zookeepers across the nation are reportedly scrambling to vaccinate all reptiles in captivity following the announcement that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has tested positive for COVID-19.
Published: Wednesday, April 20th, 2022 @ 9:03 am By: Babylon Bee
Zookeepers across the nation are reportedly scrambling to vaccinate all reptiles in captivity following the announcement that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has tested positive for COVID-19.
 
Glenn Edward Taylor, 71 of 1304 Lizard Slip Road, died Saturday, May 25, 2013 in his home.
Published: Sunday, May 26th, 2013 @ 7:14 am By: Announcements
Glenn Edward Taylor, 71 of 1304 Lizard Slip Road, died Saturday, May 25, 2013 in his home.
 
Chameleon politicians. You know, those lizards that change color to suit the environment at the time. Like the story Will Rogers is reported to have told. Seems a politician came up to Will one day and ask him for his vote.
Chameleon politicians. You know, those lizards that change color to suit the environment at the time. Like the story Will Rogers is reported to have told. Seems a politician came up to Will one day and ask him for his vote.
 

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