The State Board of Elections will hold a remote meeting at 11 a.m. on Tuesday, December 19, 2023. Any member of the public may observe the meeting online or by phone using the information below.
Published: Friday, December 15th, 2023 @ 7:42 am
By: Eastern NC NOW Staff
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As everyone can clearly see, the end of the world is right around the corner. As you take inventory of your life and possessions, you may want to start thinking about what you'll need when the inevitable downfall of American civilization arrives.
Published: Tuesday, December 12th, 2023 @ 10:28 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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During an online conversation pontificating over the pros and cons of a subject no one will remember in just a few short days, user BERNIER00LZ replied to your suggestion that "You're opinions are wrong," with the curt correction "*Your" while knowing full well exactly what you meant.
Published: Monday, November 6th, 2023 @ 6:18 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Newly discovered letters from former President Donald Trump's past have sent shockwaves through the country, as they revealed he used to fantasize regularly about being even more heterosexual than he already is.
Published: Friday, October 13th, 2023 @ 6:00 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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In response to Twitter now paying large sums of money in ad revenue sharing to content creators, rival social media platform Truth Social has announced that its users will now begin receiving payments in limited edition Donald Trump NFT trading cards.
Published: Friday, September 15th, 2023 @ 11:47 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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In response to the recent indictment by a federal grand jury for the mishandling of classified information, Donald Trump's attorneys have argued all 37 charges should be dropped because their client was simply bored of reading the back of the shampoo bottle
Published: Friday, July 21st, 2023 @ 12:36 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Access to nutritious food is foundational for overall health and well-being.
Published: Tuesday, July 18th, 2023 @ 11:44 am
By: Eastern NC NOW Staff
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After a judge ruled Trump liable in the sexual abuse and defamation case brought by E. Jean Carroll, the former President responded by announcing he would pay the $5 million judgment using his collectible NFT trading cards.
Published: Sunday, June 4th, 2023 @ 4:49 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Now that former President Trump has officially been indicted, everyone wants to know how this whole ordeal will unfold. Here are the nine things that will be happening next:
Published: Friday, April 14th, 2023 @ 8:30 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Democrat dreams of seeing President Donald Trump indicted and arrested this week were dealt a blow after Trump revealed he had preemptively pardoned himself prior to leaving office in January 2021.
Published: Wednesday, March 29th, 2023 @ 10:29 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local leprechaun, pot o' gold enthusiast, and all-around jokester Leery O'Canahan had been excited for St. Patrick's Day for months. "It's like our Super Bowl," O'Canahan told reporters. "Without the weird halftime shows."
Published: Tuesday, March 28th, 2023 @ 1:07 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Keanu Reeves took issue with “deepfakes,” artificial intelligence technology that can be used to manipulate video footage, during an interview published Tuesday.
Published: Thursday, February 23rd, 2023 @ 10:22 am
By: Daily Wire
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In one of the most momentous events in the history of mankind, a species of noble and intelligent aliens has made landfall in Florida to make first contact with the Leader of the Free World, President Donald J. Trump.
Published: Sunday, February 19th, 2023 @ 10:04 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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This week, Ron DeSantis was inaugurated to serve another 4-year term as Florida's 46th Governor following his overwhelming reelection last November.
Published: Sunday, January 8th, 2023 @ 5:17 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Donald Trump has all but disappeared after the dismal showing of the GOP during the midterm elections when Republicans barely took the House and failed to gain control of the Senate.
Published: Friday, January 6th, 2023 @ 4:29 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Former President Donald Trump revealed Thursday that the “MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT” that he teased earlier in the week was a series of digital trading cards.
Published: Thursday, December 22nd, 2022 @ 10:54 am
By: Daily Wire
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I don’t mean to be rude, but President Donald Trump’s “major announcement” — that wound up being about semi-exclusive “non-fungible tokens” made in his likeness costing $99 a pop — was pretty much the worst announcement of all time.
Published: Thursday, December 22nd, 2022 @ 10:47 am
By: Daily Wire
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Donald Trump announced a new line of collectible POGs Thursday, devastating presidential hopeful Ron DeSantis. This marks the first time brand-new POGs have been commissioned in thirty years.
Published: Saturday, December 17th, 2022 @ 8:13 am
By: Babylon Bee
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US taxpayers funding Ukrainian parliament's raises
Published: Wednesday, August 24th, 2022 @ 1:20 pm
By: Countrygirl1411
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In an unsurprising and perfectly predictable turn of events, Aunt Alice's Facebook account was hacked again.
Published: Sunday, August 21st, 2022 @ 8:10 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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This week, local man Don Johnson told friends and family he had been struck with a revelation: his “Bored Ape” NFT may not have been a bulletproof investment vehicle, and perhaps he should have diversified his investments a bit.
Published: Saturday, June 25th, 2022 @ 3:39 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Families participating in the Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) can now use their benefits for a much wider variety of infant formula brands and types
Published: Thursday, June 9th, 2022 @ 11:36 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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The US dollar is losing value as a result of burgeoning Biden-flation. Before we all end up homeless, let's take some time to reflect on some things that are more valuable than the money in your bank account. Maybe you can barter for some of these killer items before it's too late!
Published: Tuesday, May 24th, 2022 @ 4:05 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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After the spectacular crash in the cryptocurrency market this week, Matt Damon and his publicists worked overtime to produce a new commercial to apologize for convincing amateurs to invest in cryptocurrency.
Published: Tuesday, May 24th, 2022 @ 1:07 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Dissident Chinese artist Badiucao, known as the Chinese Banksy, released a collection of posters with a Beijing Olympics theme that showed the genocide and authoritarianism of the Chinese Communist Party.
Published: Friday, March 4th, 2022 @ 11:43 am
By: Daily Wire
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GOP strategist-turned-prominent-anti-Trumper Rick Wilson suggested Tuesday morning that former First Lady Melania Trump is “months away” from doing online pornography.
Published: Tuesday, January 4th, 2022 @ 3:50 pm
By: Daily Wire
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The North Carolina Department of Health and Human Services is encouraging North Carolinians who are enrolled in the federal Special Supplemental Nutrition Program for Women, Infants, and Children (WIC) to use their food benefits during COVID-19 to support good nutrition for their families.
Published: Saturday, August 15th, 2020 @ 10:22 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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The following is a statement from Karen Brinson Bell, executive director of the N.C. State Board of Elections, on Tuesday’s primary elections in North Carolina
Published: Wednesday, June 24th, 2020 @ 5:07 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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