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According to first responders, a member of the undead community has starved to death after lumbering around Capitol Hill in search of brains for several weeks and finding none.
Published: Saturday, December 23rd, 2023 @ 8:25 am
By: Babylon Bee
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SINAI — As they wandered the wilderness, the Israelites brought complaints to Moses about their lack of food, water, and the guy who kept saying, "At least we're getting our steps in!"
Published: Sunday, October 1st, 2023 @ 6:50 am
By: Babylon Bee
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A team of Marines was seen trudging through the woods, stopping every 30 feet to wave a key fob around in a 90° arc, say campers at Francis Marion National Forest.
Published: Friday, September 22nd, 2023 @ 3:48 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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A monumental archaeological expedition has uncovered the location of the Buc-ee's where the people of Israel stopped for refreshments while wandering in the desert after being freed from slavery in Egypt.
Published: Wednesday, September 20th, 2023 @ 11:28 am
By: Babylon Bee
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New Orleans Saints veteran tight end Jimmy Graham was arrested Friday night in Southern California when officers found him wandering in traffic after he suffered a “medical episode.”
Published: Thursday, September 14th, 2023 @ 6:04 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Terror has rocked a small Moblin treehouse community after Gary L., a beloved Moblin relaxing by the campfire was slain by a wandering psychopath.
Published: Monday, June 12th, 2023 @ 11:30 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local man Daniel Bridgeman found his mind wandering after his wife's story entered a second overtime and ninth detour. Reports confirm he shifted into a panicked prayer, however, as his wife began winding up and he realized she may end her long story with a question.
Published: Thursday, May 18th, 2023 @ 12:54 am
By: Babylon Bee
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A married couple was seen wandering the mall Monday, when the owner of one cool knife stopped to take a gander at more cool knives on display in the window of the Stabology storefront. The owner of 73 purses then asked her companion why he needed more than one cool knife.
Published: Sunday, April 16th, 2023 @ 3:10 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Aides are scrambling to keep the President on track without wandering off stage and getting lost again on national television. To combat this, Biden's handlers have resorted to laying down a trail of women's hair on the ground for Biden to sniff and follow.
Published: Sunday, December 18th, 2022 @ 3:31 am
By: Babylon Bee
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A few days ago, President Joe Biden moseyed away from his podium while speaking to a group of FEMA workers.
Published: Saturday, October 8th, 2022 @ 10:33 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Senior Florida officials said Monday that the 50 illegal immigrants that were flown to Martha’s Vineyard last week were effectively “wandering homeless along the border” before they were flown to the sanctuary city.
Published: Monday, September 26th, 2022 @ 1:30 am
By: Daily Wire
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Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre brought out President Biden during Thursday's press briefing to demonstrate the president's new toddler leash.
Published: Wednesday, July 6th, 2022 @ 9:49 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The White House grounds have entered a lockdown following the sighting of a senile old man wandering around waving a gun and making outlandish demands.
Published: Thursday, April 21st, 2022 @ 9:16 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Yesterday, Senator Thom Tillis (R-NC), a member of the Senate Judiciary Committee, joined Senators Chuck Grassley (R-IA) and Amy Klobuchar (D-MN) to introduce bipartisan legislation to help families locate missing loved ones with Alzheimer's disease, autism and related conditions
Published: Wednesday, November 8th, 2017 @ 4:44 pm
By: Thom Tillis
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The Blue Ridge Parkway running along the crest of the Blue Ridge Mountains offers the wandering aventurers: panoramic vistas, sunny mountain meadows, and hiking trails of varying difficulty.
Published: Thursday, June 3rd, 2010 @ 3:06 pm
By: Stan Deatherage
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