What is That on my Eyeglasses? | Eastern NC Now

Another thorny issue solved by me. You are very welcome.

ENCNow
I spend my whole day being careful not to touch the lenses of my eyeglasses and they get filthy anyway.

    This has baffled me for years. If you wear glasses, I am certain it has baffled you for years also.

    Wonder no more. The answer has been right before your eyes all this time. Are you ready for this? You are going to kick yourself for missing this obvious answer...

    Eyeglass Smudges Float In The Air & Attach Themselves To Your Glasses Whenever You Get Within 10 Feet

    They are pulled in at lightning speed just like one of those Black Holes in outer space. They are impossible to avoid.

    There have been reports of glasses falling off wearer's faces for no apparent reason. This happens because these glasses have been hit by Whopper Smudges (one measuring fifteen centimeters across). There are even reports of Whopper Smudges causing severe whiplash.

    Now that I have figured this out for you, you can rest easy. You have probably been afraid you were losing it. You probably are losing it but now you will have to find some other explanation as to the reason why.

    Would I kid u?
    Smartfella
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Comments

( March 25th, 2018 @ 2:57 pm )
 
And a wonderful metaphor it is.
( March 24th, 2018 @ 12:00 pm )
 
'Big Hat; no Cattle' is a Texas missive statement.
( March 23rd, 2018 @ 8:30 am )
 
Missive as in: Long substantively, but short or minimalist in presentation. Like 'little big message'.
( March 18th, 2018 @ 10:51 am )
 
Missive?
( May 19th, 2016 @ 1:06 pm )
 
Sadly, this short missive speaks rather directly to me.



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