Judge to Defendant, “Do You Understand The Charges Against You?” Defendant to Judge, “Huh?” ... Part 2 | Beaufort County Now | None of us want to go to jail. That being said, there is a pretty good chance that some who are in jail do not know why they are in jail. | humor, funny, crimes, criminal charges

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Judge to Defendant, “Do You Understand The Charges Against You?” Defendant to Judge, “Huh?” ... Part 2

    Below are actual crimes I have read about in the newspaper...

      • A Church Was Set Afire ... The charge was, "Use of fire to commit a felony". (What happened to tried and true Arson?)

      • Another Church Was Set Afire ... The charge was, "Damage or destruction to religious property". (Kind of makes one think that, if it were not religious property and just plain ole property, no crime would have been committed.)

      • Murder ... The charge was, "Malicious Murder". (If the murder was not malicious, might the dead person still be alive?)

      • Our City Hall Was Spray Painted ... The charge was, "Interference with government property". (What happened to Vandalism? Sort of sounds like one of those big columns in front of City Hall wanted to move to the other side of the building to get out of the sun and somebody blocked its way.)

    I bet that some of you are still thinking I make these things up. If I made them up, they would be foolish but they would not be this silly. There is a distinction. Just don't ask me to explain the distinction.

    Would I kid u?
    Smartfella

    Lagniappe: This Lagniappe was added 12/14/16.

    I could go into a tirade about how we ought to ban all forms of communication about crimes that are committed because it gives the less-innovative criminals among us ideas that they might not come up with on their own.

    Case in point...A few months ago criminals rammed a pick-up truck into the wall of a Gun Shop/Firing Range and made off with a whole bunch of Handguns, Rifles and Ammunition. Two days ago suspects rammed their pick-up through the wall of a local Pawn Shop and made off with a bunch of Gaming Systems, Video Games, and a TV.

    Can't you just see one of these bad guys watching TV and seeing the story about the Gun Shop/Firing Range and being bolted upright like Archimedes and saying out loud, "Eureka! What will they think up next? That's a great idea! I've got to call Bruiser and tell him about this!"

    What does all of this have to do with the Original Blog Posting about Confusing Charges? I'm sorry you don't already see it but you don't because you and you and I am me and I notice things and you don't.

    It's that, in the Pawn Shop Crime, my newspaper felt it necessary to call the bad guys "Suspects". I can understand that, if my newspaper were writing about a particular person who has yet to be tried, they would have a assume innocence and refer to that individual as a "Suspect" but that's not where we are in this story. These bad guys (Am I allowed to say "Bad Guys" just because they are reported to have done bad things?) damaged property and stole things. That is a fact.

    I can see where I am getting in too deep on this one. I better obtain the services of a lawyer before I say, imply, insinuate and/or peck out something for which I will be sorry.

    I can't help myself. I must ask one more question...If a proven criminal were hanged for his proven crimes, how long after he is hanged are we required to call him a Suspected Hanged Person before we can officially call him a Dead as a Door Nail Person?


HbAD0

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