Publisher's note: Jeff Kay writes for and publishes the West Virginia Surf Report, and by his consent, this article is published here on BCN.
- I'm scheduled to get my first dose of the vaccine tomorrow afternoon. It's through my job, and I signed up the moment I was eligible. Needless to say, there's differing opinions on it. But I'm totally onboard. We have to get this shit behind us. So we can get back to baseball stadiums, concert halls, and a normal non-stilted trip to the goddamn Cracker Barrel. Oh yeah, and for health reasons too, I suppose.
- Yesterday I randomly chose a pair of underwear from the drawer that caused me great discomfort throughout the day. It wasn't a tightness issue, it was the way they're designed. There's a mashing effect, and not enough give. Know what I'm talking about? There has to be some give! An uncomfortable pair of underwear can flat-out ruin your quality of life. Yet, at the same time... a comfortable pair is rarely appreciated. It's like some jobs I've had in my life: I was only noticed when something went wrong. I was nothing more than a corporate ball sock. In any case, I will be more careful with my selection today. And, perhaps, a weeding out should happen soon?
- I recently stopped at a Sheetz convenience store on my way home from work and ordered a grilled cheese sandwich: Swiss and cheddar on sourdough, with a slice of ham. And as I was standing there waiting on it to be prepared this dude walked up and started engaging a touch screen. Hey, whatever. Portly men with dinosaur feet need to eat too. Also, the sandwich was delicious, in case you were focusing on all the wrong things.
The main topic I was planning to write about is something that happened to me a half-dozen or so times when I was a kid. It was before fifth grade, I know, because it happened at our first house on 21st Street. Are you familiar with something called sleep paralysis? I saw it mentioned somewhere online recently, and it triggered some unpleasant memories.
It's where you're asleep but dream you're awake — and paralyzed. It's genuinely terrifying. Your heart starts pounding, and it feels oh-so-real. I also recall trying to yell for my parents and not being able to do that either. Like I say, it happened maybe five or six times, all when I was young. But, thankfully, not once after 6th grade or so.
Have you experienced this horror? I've read that people have had heart attacks as a result of sleep paralysis, and I can believe it. It's terrible.
I also had a dream, around the same time, that my parents were killed in a nightclub fire. I mean, they weren't hanging out in too many nightclubs at the time, so there were plot holes. But it was so detailed and real that I remember my grandfather breaking the news to me and my brother, and seeing the news reports on TV. I can see the outside of the smoldering building in my mind. It still gives me a full-body shiver when I think about it. Crazy!
Thankfully that insanity stopped — after puberty? I don't know the science behind it, but I'm happy it ended.
Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? Do you know what I'm talking about? Share your stories in the comments section, if you're so inclined. Also, did you ever have a scary dream a long time ago that still haunts you? Not a "really weird dream" with Harry S. Truman, Mr. Whipple, and a salsa band. But something that was full-on terrifying? Please share. And, by the way, what do you think our Sheetz friend dreams about? I'd like to get your thoughts on that too.
And I need to call it a day, my friends.
I'll be back soon, very soon.
Have a great weekend!