Jerk In Front Of You Going Speed Limit

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Beaufort County Schools are building a new school on the same ground where Eastern Elementary already exists, at a cost of $10,500,000.00 to Beaufort County's Taxpayers. Is this a wise expense of taxpayer dollars at this time?

21.74% Yes, Beaufort County has been awarded a 42 million dollars of grant money from the state of North Carolina (FREE MONEY) to construct school at 3.00 per squ. ft.

67.39% No, this is the wrong time, to build the wrong school, on the wrong placement - its lowest point - of Eastern Elementary's existing location, when community schools work best.

10.87% Why should I care about the public's education?

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Published: Tuesday, August 15th, 2023 @ 1:56 am
By: Babylon Bee ( More Entries )

    Publisher's note: This post appears here on BCN with the expressed permission of the Babylon Bee - friends that can find your funny bone in a very dark room.

    BOISE, ID     A new report confirmed by multiple sources indicates the guy driving in front of you has the absolute nerve to drive the legal speed limit on the one-lane freeway you're driving on. What a jerk!

    "You're supposed to go 5-10 miles per hour over the limit, everyone knows this," said one eyewitness who also found himself stuck behind the thoughtless creep going 65 miles per hour like an utter weirdo. "This guy obviously either didn't get the memo or he's literally never driven a car before. Jerk!"

    Though exceeding the posted speed limit is legally wrong, all sensible Americans have agreed to an unspoken rule that speed limits are more like guidelines. "Nobody drives the speed limit," continued the witness. "You either drive below the speed limit, in which case you're a grandpa who doesn't belong on the road, or you go way too fast, in which case you're an impatient moron who has no regard for the safety of others. But drive the speed limit? Only MAJOR jerks do that."

    The jerk driving the speed limit in front of you could not be reached for comment, but that does not change the fact that he is, as suspected, a jerk. "Every reasonable person drives faster than the speed limit," the eyewitness concluded. "It's just like insurance fraud. Is it technically illegal? Yes. But everyone does it anyway, right? No? Why are you looking at me like that?"

    At publishing time, an investigation was ongoing to determine if the jerk driving the speed limit in front of you was actually a dangerous psychopath or just merely a jerk.

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