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An emergency alert message was errantly sent to over 330 million phones today after President Biden accidentally hit the wrong button reaching for his Life Alert.
Published: Tuesday, December 5th, 2023 @ 2:15 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local man Jeremy Carmichael made a groundbreaking dietary discovery this week after realizing he could shed a few pounds by not stopping at the local Chevron on his way to work every morning to purchase a double-decker oatmeal creme pie.
Published: Saturday, October 14th, 2023 @ 4:33 am
By: Babylon Bee
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There you are, sitting across from an elderly, demented man drooling on his oatmeal, when suddenly you begin to wonder: Am I in a nursing home, or in the chambers of the United States Senate??
Published: Wednesday, September 27th, 2023 @ 3:27 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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During a balloon-bedazzled spectacle on the front steps of the White House, unifying and decent President Biden reiterated that the giant, oversized check from Burisma that he held in his hands was right-wing misinformation.
Published: Tuesday, September 19th, 2023 @ 1:08 am
By: Babylon Bee
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As investigators continue to find more and more classified documents in various Biden residences, the President attempted to divert attention from the scandal this morning by appearing in a tan suit.
Published: Wednesday, January 18th, 2023 @ 2:22 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Biblical scholars have at last uncovered a missing verse from the end of the book of Leviticus that reads: ‘So Anyway, All That To Say, Here's A Killer Oatmeal Cookie Recipe'.
Published: Thursday, October 20th, 2022 @ 7:53 am
By: Babylon Bee
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The late Queen of England Elizabeth II has received a worldwide outpouring of love and support in the days since her death. Seeing an opportunity, Biden has reportedly asked aides if he should try dying to boost his approval numbers a couple of points.
Published: Thursday, September 22nd, 2022 @ 1:10 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Depending on who you ask there are many ways to say grace before a meal. You show us how you pray when gathered with others and we'll tell you what that says about your theology.
Published: Monday, May 30th, 2022 @ 12:55 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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School is closed due to the storm that flooded a lot of the area. The rabbit patch sits "high and dry"unscathed, thankfully.
Published: Sunday, September 30th, 2018 @ 12:15 am
By: Michele Rhem
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It started snowing in the late evening, yesterday. Today, when light came to the rabbit patch, the territory looked like a post card from a place like "New England" or my friend "Fayes' Iowa".
Published: Friday, January 19th, 2018 @ 5:50 am
By: Michele Rhem
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After a brief hiatus for the summer, I'm happy to report that Tansey Topics is back.
Published: Monday, August 18th, 2014 @ 12:14 pm
By: Barbara Tansey
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