DENTWOOD, IA — Sources at the Mannfred household confirmed Monday that 35-year-old Kurt Mannfred's stack of Christmas gifts was "virtually indistinguishable" from the sort of presents that would have been given to a 9-year-old boy.
Published: Thursday, January 18th, 2024 @ 1:24 am
By: Babylon Bee
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There's a lot of talk about healthcare, how much it costs, and which country has figured it out best.
Published: Saturday, December 16th, 2023 @ 8:50 am
By: Babylon Bee
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With his note to the real-life Jets falling on deaf ears, Colin Kaepernick decided today to use his likeness to make himself the Jets quarterback in Madden 24.
Published: Saturday, November 25th, 2023 @ 12:24 am
By: Babylon Bee
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After you get married, it's common for the flame of love to cool, with each spouse eventually reaching the point of using the toilet with the bathroom door open, wearing nothing but sweatpants around the house, and finding deep-seated flaws in the way each other breathes.
Published: Friday, November 24th, 2023 @ 1:45 am
By: Babylon Bee
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It's not easy being a dad. Exemplifying bravery, leadership, and wisdom while simultaneously consuming an entire pig's worth of bacon per day and explaining to your wife how every daily event relates to The Lord of the Rings is hard work.
Published: Tuesday, November 21st, 2023 @ 12:30 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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A local mother was quick to express her gratitude to her young son after the boy helpfully made it known that he had an incredibly important school science project that was due in the next five minutes.
Published: Wednesday, October 25th, 2023 @ 3:46 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Former President Donald Trump vowed on Friday that he would run for president from the inside of a prison cell if he is convicted in the criminal cases that he faces.
Published: Tuesday, August 15th, 2023 @ 6:28 pm
By: Daily Wire
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With the actors' strike threatening to halt filming, the producers of Snow White decided to replace the dwarves with seven people chosen at random from a San Francisco homeless camp.
Published: Saturday, July 22nd, 2023 @ 9:42 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Former President Trump defended his alleged retention of classified national defense documents during an interview this week, saying that “every good lawyer” agrees with his assertion that he did nothing wrong.
Published: Monday, July 17th, 2023 @ 5:34 am
By: Daily Wire
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Former President Donald Trump reportedly ignored in a plan late last year — after his Mar-a-Lago home was raided by the FBI — from one of his top lawyers to defuse the federal criminal investigation into his handling of sensitive U.S. government records.
Published: Tuesday, June 27th, 2023 @ 10:21 am
By: Daily Wire
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A Mississippi high school boy who claims he is a girl was told by his school he had to wear boy’s clothes to his high school graduation — and then his parents sued the school district to force them to allow him to wear a dress.
Published: Wednesday, June 7th, 2023 @ 2:50 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Sen. Tim Scott (R-SC) slammed ABC’s “The View” during a presidential campaign stop over the weekend in Iowa while announcing that he was going on the show this week.
Published: Tuesday, June 6th, 2023 @ 3:28 pm
By: Daily Wire
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A local father has run into a problem familiar to other dads across the country, as by the time he had finished installing a new car seat for his young child, the child had already outgrown it.
Published: Tuesday, May 2nd, 2023 @ 5:36 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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With warmer weather on the way, the North Carolina Department of Health and Human Services urges North Carolinians to "Fight the Bite" by taking measures to reduce their risk of tick- and mosquito-borne diseases.
Published: Tuesday, April 11th, 2023 @ 4:32 pm
By: Eastern NC NOW Staff
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Seeking to be fully prepared to capitalize on any potential woke misstep by another major American corporation, Daily Wire CEO Jeremy Boreing is now reportedly setting up shop in a large warehouse full of tires, waiting for Goodyear to say something to cause conservative outrage.
Published: Saturday, March 11th, 2023 @ 7:39 am
By: Babylon Bee
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President Biden has spent the weekend putting together a beautiful arrangement of the most lethal, advanced weaponry in existence to send to President Zelensky for Valentine's Day.
Published: Wednesday, February 15th, 2023 @ 12:41 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Local wife Victoria Crab phoned her husband in the early evening Thursday to see if he could run by the store real quick on his way home from work so he could grab a couple thousand items.
Published: Thursday, January 26th, 2023 @ 9:06 am
By: Babylon Bee
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By law, the Utilities Commission’s Carbon Plan must chart the “reasonable,” “least cost path” to emissions reductions with “least cost planning of generation” that would “maintain and improve upon the reliability of the grid”
Published: Wednesday, January 25th, 2023 @ 7:12 am
By: John Locke Foundation
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Sources close to local man Payton Martin allege that he used to be a fun, carefree young man who loved getting fun gifts for Christmas — and who was "super sad and disappointed" when he opened a big package under the Christmas tree only to find that it was a pack of socks.
Published: Wednesday, January 4th, 2023 @ 5:20 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Local wife Chelsea Hammond has just proposed a brand new 4,155-page Target funding bill to her husband but is only giving him 2 days to read through it all.
Published: Sunday, January 1st, 2023 @ 11:41 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Sen.-elect John Fetterman (D-PA), who often wears a hoodie and occasionally dons a suit, has been included in a list of America’s “most stylish” compiled by The New York Times.
Published: Wednesday, December 21st, 2022 @ 2:03 am
By: Daily Wire
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The World Cup courted controversy this week after one of the teams continued racking up an obscene number of points even after it was clear they were already poised to win 1-0.
Published: Saturday, November 26th, 2022 @ 1:21 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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As North Carolinians begin to feel the impacts, including power outages and flooding, from the remnants of Hurricane Ian, officials from the NC Department of Health and Human Services are urging residents to properly prepare for impacts from the storm.
Published: Saturday, October 1st, 2022 @ 3:59 am
By: Eastern NC NOW Staff
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Local wife and mother of three Hannah Baxter was tired of constantly reminding her husband, Brad, to put his socks in the dirty clothes hamper.
Published: Wednesday, August 31st, 2022 @ 9:41 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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Fathers are the forgotten heroes of this world. Mothers get all the glory (and with good reason!) but there are still some great benefits to being a dad. For example, free hugs whenever you want!
Published: Tuesday, July 5th, 2022 @ 4:43 pm
By: Babylon Bee
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It's a lot of responsibility to be the patriarch of your household. Leading your family through a woke world that wants to cause them spiritual harm is a stressful job. Also, sometimes your wife doesn't make that sandwich you ask for. Life is hard!
Published: Monday, June 6th, 2022 @ 10:43 am
By: Babylon Bee
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Britney Spears elicited concern among her fans after posting a series of full-front naked pictures on Instagram on Monday.
Published: Thursday, May 12th, 2022 @ 6:43 pm
By: Daily Wire
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Kick off the Holiday Season with holly jolly celebrations at the return of Greenville Gives to Five Points Plaza on Friday, December 3rd.
Published: Wednesday, December 1st, 2021 @ 9:59 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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What about NC?
Published: Saturday, October 30th, 2021 @ 7:13 am
By: Countrygirl1411
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Exporting Supports 400,000 Jobs Across State
Published: Friday, February 12th, 2021 @ 2:09 am
By: Governor's Office
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Victor Davis Hanson of National Review Online delivers a warning to the president-elect.
Published: Monday, December 21st, 2020 @ 1:15 pm
By: John Locke Foundation
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Kick off the Holiday Season with holly jolly celebrations as Uptown and The City of Greenville host Greenville Gives in the Uptown District from 5 to 8 p.m. on Saturday, December 5.
Published: Saturday, December 5th, 2020 @ 3:40 am
By: Stan Deatherage
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Months now into the COVID–19 quarantine, we’re still probably some time away from a new normal, however that looks.
Published: Sunday, May 17th, 2020 @ 10:31 pm
By: Carolina Journal
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